Uh, yeah right. Like you even cared about the welfare of all of us.
Please stop talking as though you're the boss of the whole school. Because you know what? YOU'RE NOT. Face it. Seriously.. Its not like, I don't want to help you or anything like that. But, what you did was really too extreme, don't you think?
Yeahyeah, now the whole class hates me. But you know what? I don't really care. Because I didn't do wrong, did I? Maybe I did? I don't know.
Why are the things that I do never deemed as fit in everyone's sight? Is it because everyone else's standards are too high? Or because I just fall below the expectations everyone.
This is so difficult to comprehend. Like, whats the problem?
I think I'll start to dread school. I mean, the year was great to start with, but now.. it seems as though I don't even have control over my own life. Wait, this is wrong. I'm not even supposed to have control. I should let God take the wheel.
But, yet again, WHY? Why should I let someone like her manipulate my life and my friendships. Speaking of friendships. I'm a failure at that. Everything seems to crash on me. Why didn't I speak the truth? Why did I let my own selfish thoughts take control of me? Why did I do that? Why did I say that? What was I thinking. Thinking that everything would be alright, like no one would find out? Like she wouldn't even care?
SAMANTHA CHUA, WISE UP. THIS IS GOING NOWHERE.
you've got to let God take the lead. Since things have already become like that, no poit harbouring over it already, isn't it?
I have committed so much murder. Uh, I know its wrong to hate God's creations. But sometimes I really do feel as though I hate myself. This is crazy. I don't even know what I'm doing nowadays. I don't know whats going on. Its as though life is just to please people that are around me, pleasing people who have that certain expectations and images of me.
If this continues, I think I'll go nuts.
You know what? I'm going to find someonw and I'm going to pour it out face to face with that person, and I'll just break down in front of that person if need be.
Dear Lord, you said that you have plans to prosper us and not to harm us.
I pray that you'll reveal that sovereign plan that you have for me.

To 2e5:
I'm sorry, things have become like that because of what I did. Uhm, I really hope that you people understand that I was just doing what I was supposed to. And even though alot of you hate me now, well, I have nothing to say. Just that I'm sorry and I really hope you understand. I don't think you would be able to feel the way I do now. And I don't expect you people to empathize with me. However, I just wanna say that I wasn't doing it for myself or to please anyone. It was to do what I felt and think is right. I'm sorry.

And nobody knows the weaknesses in me, except you. If this is to be a test, let me pass it, knowing that it is your will and your plan that you have for me. I believe that you'll see me through. Even though I really feel as though everything is going wrong. Help me to be able to continue being cheerful, as though nothing is wrong, because my problems are nothing compared to others, and there is nothing that you cannot solve for me. Because you are mighty to save and your love for me will never falter. You'll see me through. I'm sure of it.

SAMANTHA