Samantha

2010-03-18T01:37:00.001-07:00

I CAME BACK TO REVIVE MY BLOG BECAUSE IT HAS BEEN DEAD FOR MANY MILLION YEARS. ANYWAYS, HAHA. HELLOS. :)

Sorry for not updating and yeah. I will try to update now and then, if I feel happy and if I'm not lazy! :D

2009-12-25T05:52:00.000-08:00

Christmas is the time to love.

Its christmas! Its just so amazing thinking about what I was doing last christmas and in comparison to this year. I miss last year, really. But I believe that there are better things awaiting me in the next year to come.

Christmas is the time, christmas is the time, christmas is the time to love.

Love the song, but there’s one thing that I don’t quite agree with. Shouldn’t we all be loving each other in EVERY season and not just christmas only? So in actual fact, the song should be like, christmas is the time to love even more because we understand and celebrate God’s immense love for us.

—————–

Gosh, you just don’t understand huh. Even during christmas, I will not. And you shouldn’t either.

emmanuel has come.

2009-11-18T18:05:00.000-08:00

Conversations in the bedroom

18th November 2009

11:05 PM

Me: Yeah, so annoying right? Like, urgh. I mean.. yeah. Like, YEAHHHH.

Justyn: How can you do that Sam? Dump a guy over the phone?

Me: I did NOT dump him. I have NEVER been with him, you dooo dooo bird.

Jerome: (half asleep) *cough cough cough*

Justyn: You know I’m typing all of this down on my computer? Sam, for the past few minutes, you said… “Yeah, like, so annoying, like, yeahhhh. Annoying, annoying, annoying.”

Me: (Starts laughing hysterically) I’m dyinngggg. I’m laughinngggg. Please help meeeee.

—— Door is flung wide open ——-

Joel: Jie! What happened to you?

Me: Oh, we were just talking about how funny you are. (Continues laughing hysterically)

Jerome: Wah, Joel so good ah. Only lose to gor gor by 19 goals ONLY. HAHAAAAAA

Me: AHAHAHAHAHAHA! HELP! HELP! ULS! ULS! ULS! (Uncontrollable laughter syndrome)

Justyn: (Keeps typing on his computer)

—— Door is flung open again ——

Aunty: Aiyoh Joel ah. Go brush your teeth la.

Me: HAHAHAHHAHAA. HELLLPPP.

Jerome: EEEEEWWWW, Joel never brush teeth. *cough cough cough*

Joel: YEAHH, SOOOO? Eh, Jie! Why you keep laughing???!!!

Me: HAHAAAAA. ULS ULS. HELP HELP!

Justyn: You people are so funny. (starts reading whatever has been said for the past few
minutes again)

Me: Justynn!!! Save this conversation! I’m gonna blog about this tmr. HAHAAAA.

2009-11-06T05:54:00.000-08:00

Lit is over, Bio is over! 3 papers in one day and I lived through it, praise God.

Actually very tired, hand aching like mad. But yep, just so happy that its over now. I can imagine how ecstatic I’ll be once Os are officially over.

But for now, concentrate on MCQ! Its the very very very very last lap.

My hope is built on nothing less, than Jesus’s blood and righteousness.

Saw something today which just, I don’t know, I didn’t feel unhappy but, it was just a weird feeling I guess. Like, of all things, you had to use that? A bit weird don’t you think? Ohwell, whatever.

God is so good, hallelujah!

2009-10-07T07:05:00.000-07:00

Wait a minute, it's time to pause for a while.

Tired:(
Got to focus again. Just two more weeks, thats all. I can do this, I can.
Must not let anything distract me, especially at this crucial time. 2 more days in St. Marg’s.

Dear God, please help me. Help me not to think and speculate but trust that you have my interests at heart and you will not let me fall. Amen.

2009-10-01T06:47:00.000-07:00

I am who I am cause it’s my God who made me
I am who I am cause His power has redeemed me

Thank you Lord, for everything You have done, for everything You are doing, for everything You are about to do.

Thank you God, for my prelim results. Even though they were not exceptionally good, thank you for sustaining me through the entire duration of prelims.

Tomorrow is another day to live, another day to praise God. Another day to live in the love of God.

‘I want you to be fighters.’ Yes, I am going to be a fighter.

2009-09-13T06:02:00.000-07:00

As water reflects a face, so a man's heart reflects the man. - Proverbs 27:19

Its the end of Sept holidays. When I think of what I was doing last year.. Gosh, I really do miss last year. :(

Septembe break was alright I guess. I busied myself with lectures and tutorials everyday. Soaking and immersing myself in aqueous solutions of books. Chem is on my mind right now. Chem, chem, chem. Alkenes, alkanes, carboxylic acids. Okay, I'm typing rubbish because I'm watching TV while I'm typing. The DejaVu show. I think they should make it a comedy. Laughter is good for health.

Ohwells. Went to study with Caleb on Thursday. It was more like, I was asking him questions. Thank you! (If you're reading this).

------------------------

Anyways, this quote was in the bulletin in church today.

Do all the good you cn by all the means you can by all the ways you can in all the places you can and at all the times you can to all the people you can as long as you ever can. - John Wesley.

Sometimes, the spirit is willing to do things but yet the flesh is weak. Dear Lord, please empower me to use my life for in all the ways I can. Not just for self credit, but to build others up as well.

Alright, I shall go now. Tired and weary. Prelims start again tmr. :(

everywhere it seem that i'm reminded of that soul shattering truth. yet, so many times when i want to do something, something i think is right, that will bring more comfort, you never seem to respond. it is not that hard to respond, right?

2009-09-08T07:25:00.001-07:00

Life is like an MRT train. Honestly!

Refreshing insight, eh? The idea generates from the fact that in life, there will be many people board and alight from your MRT train. When the MRT train first starts, the number of people who board your train is minute. Then, as you drive along the way, you realise that you pick up more and more passengers. (Just like how the train is the most crowded along Orchard/City Hall/Raffles Place). And then as you go along somemore and reach your final destination, you'll realise that there aren't many passengers left in the train anymore.

This is when I start to wonder... how many of the friends I have now, will be there in my train all the way until I reach the end point? And how many people will be there from the start of the journey all the way to the end? I think the number will be less than the fingers that I have.

Well of course, halfway through the journey when I get tired, weary and sick of driving the train, there will be that one partner that the company (God) sends to me, to accompany me throughout all the ups and downs, the joy and sorrow. And that person, will be a partner for life. But of course, that person will come very much later because as of now.. I'm still managing the train quite well, with the extra strength and grace from God.

Everything may change, but I know one thing for sure. God will always be in the front seat, next to me guiding me while I drive my MRT train. And my family will be in the first carriage. From beginning to the end, always supporting me.

Until the day I reach the end of my journey, then I will realise which one of my passengers (friends) have been there from start to end. And which partner God has given to me. My train may meet rocks, stones, whatever else. It may even malfunction and break down for a period of time. But the engine will be refilled with oil (love, grace, joy, hope, strength) from God. And I will keep driving on the railways.

So then I wonder, will you be the one at the end?

2009-09-06T06:38:00.000-07:00

Its so hard being recognised sometimes.

Followed my brother for a trial tutorial lesson today. And then this St. Marg’s girl walked in. I didn’t know she was from St. Marg’s cause she wasn’t in her uniform, and she was a Sec1. (I don’t recognise ALL Sec1s okay.) Yep. So when I got back home, I went onto facebook. And guess what I saw.

Sec 1 girl’s facebook status read: GUESS WHO I SAW AT TUTORIAL SESSION TODAY? SAMANTHA CHUA. THE HEAD PREFECT.

So, I happily went to tag on her facebook status. I said, “Haha, hello. Nice meeting you."

And she replied. Like, “GAH”

Haha. Funny right? Aiyoh. I’m a normal girl, student. Its either people get scared of my when I’m in school. Or people like me in school or people hate me in school. Whichever it is, people just know me. :/ Ohwells. Compared to those celebrities out there, I think I’m quite fortunate actually. Cause I don’t really get stalked. So yeah.

Anyways, if you’re from my school and maybe you’re a junior or sth, this is for you to read.

I am a perfectly normal teenager. Haha, I face teenage issues like everyone else in this World. So yes, please don’t feel afriad of me. But of course, if you break rules, I will do something about it because that is what I am supposed to do. And yes, if you want to talk to me, just talk okay? Haha.

Gosh, this is so funny. Never thought I would have to do sth like that.

Anyways, trial lesson was alright. In the end, I’m the one who’s going to go for lessons. I really pray that its not too late. And, must really thank God for everyone who has been helping or is going to help me. Thank you thank you. When my Os are over, I’ll make it up to all of you.

Alright, shall go now. Nights!

Father, you are king over the storm. I will be still and know you are God.

2009-09-01T05:29:00.000-07:00

PRELIMS START TMR.
So, I may M-I-A for a while to study.
Wait, actually.. I may not M-I-A since theres a one week break next week.
SS and English tmr.
:/ Ohwells, trust in God to see me through everything!

--------------

Sometimes, when I think back, I realise that everyone is blessed in their own way.
But, sometimes, just sometimes, there are some who are more blessed than others.

-------------

Talked to Natania online ystd. :D
HURRY FLY BACK YOU!!

-------------

Alright, I shall go now.

If you read this, but didn't do anything, I'd be disappointed.

2009-08-29T06:38:00.001-07:00

It makes me wonder if I’m doing enough, wonder if I’m doing the best that I can, wonder if I did what was right.

The past week was alright, not spectacular, not bad either. Its just that with each day that passes, I’m nearer to prelims and Os. Prelims are starting this Wed. Which is, I don’t know how to explain. Stressful, really.

The entire week was filled with so many doubts. I didn’t know what was going on, and I don’t know whats going on until now.

Friday was by far the worst day of the week. I don’t exactly know how to exaplain this in words, but it wasn’t a very nice feeling. Its like sitting down there knowing full well about what was going on, yet being rendered as helpless, even though you know that you’re the only one who has enough to make that difference. I know I shouldn’t be worrying about this now, especially with prelims just next week. But, there are some things which will just be there, whether you like it or not.

Sometimes I wonder if there is anyone who will actually understand how I feel, and give me solid advice, rather than saying, “trust in God”, or “I’ll pray for you.” I already know this, and I’m doing that fervently. But I guess I need someone who will be there, to shake me and wake me up, someone to help me through this.

It makes me wonder, if everything I have done was to waste.

I made a promise that I would make a difference last year. I wonder if I made that difference. I wonder if anyone felt that difference, I wonder if anyone saw that difference. I also told myself that we’d do well to make her cry at the end. But we didn’t. That was a regret. I’m not trying to be sadist. Unless you know who I’m talking about, then you won’t really get it.

I wonder if anything I do now, or in the future will be of any help. I wonder if I can still do what I promised to. I wonder if thay will repeat the mistakes that I made.

My heart wrenched when I heard what they wanted to do.

For only you know whats going on, and only you will see us through this.

2009-08-19T05:46:00.001-07:00

English Orals tmr and I'm having an ulcer now.

Me shall sleep early today. Its like, only 845 now. But, haha. I shall attempt to sleep.

Dear God, please help to take the ulcer away. Amen.

2009-08-11T06:37:00.001-07:00

Its amazing how you can speak right to my heart. Without saying a word, you light up the dark.

I'm currently obsessed with this phrase, "You've got issues."

I don't know why, I just keep saying it. Esp. to Yu Xian who didn't buy a hair tie to tie her hair because she didn't want to waste her money. She's so funny seriously. She spends excessively on LV and Prada, yet can't bear to buy a rubber band. Ironic, isn't it?

I'm tireddd :( CTs this week which is horrible. I just thank God that we had the day off yesterday.

Went for the dance show thingy with ShihWei ystd. It was, funny. Okay, funny in a weird sense la. I was waving through the glass window and that pootoot Ian didn't even see me. He couldn't even recognise my voice. -.- Yeah. If you're reading this, well done once again. Just sad your partner never smile. :( Ouch.

SS CT was not bad today. Its just that the question phrasing was, queer. "Are you surprised by what the Source says?" Yesyes, very surprised, very surprised.

I realised I'm becoming meaner and meaner by the day. Very bad, very bad. :( I must stop judging people and looking at things through jaundiced eyes.

--------------------------------

Feeling mixed right now. It's a funny feeling, really. Somewhat happy, yet filled with a tinge of sadness. I'm weird, really. I wonder if there's any word profound enough to express how I'm feeling now. Its just, weird. Try as you may, I doubt you can ever define this.

------------------------------

ALPHANIGHT THIS FRI. Rah. I'm feeling nervous actually. Two songs by myself, without Joan. OHWELLS.

"Guard your heart for it determines your life." - Thank you, God.

2009-08-04T06:26:00.000-07:00

I'm sick of failing A math.
Really.
Maybe I'm just dumb or sth. Or my brain can't function during A math tests and exams.
Its a horrible and disgusting feeling.
I'm sick of failing A math.

2009-07-21T07:04:00.000-07:00

I’ve been awake for a while now
You’ve got me feelin’ like a child now
Cause every time I see your bubbly face
I get the tinglies in a silly place

It starts in my toes
Makes me crinkle my nose
Where ever it goes
I always know
That you make me smile
Please stay for a while now
Just take your time
Where ever you go

The rain is fallin’ on my window pane
But we are hidin’ in a safer place
Under the covers stayin dry and warm
You give me feelins that I adore

What am i gonna say
when you make me feel this way
I just… mm.

I’ve been asleep for a while now
You tuck me in just like a child now
Cause every time you hold me in your arms
I’m comfortable enough to feel your warmth

It starts in my soul
And I lose all control
When you kiss my nose
The feelin shows
Cause you make me smile
Baby just take your time
Holdin’ me tight

Where ever, where ever, where ever you go.

2009-07-15T06:48:00.000-07:00

Oh darling, just have faith.

Went to the doctor’s today, cause of my never ceasing headache.

The doctor said, “This is a symptom caused by stress. Its a tension headache. I suggest that you take time off your studies and do something you enjoy.”

Right, I was like.. huh? Okay. I seriously thought there was something wrong with me cause my headache isn’t seem to be going away. But, the doctor says I’m just way too stressed or sth like that. Queer huh?

I wonder whether God has been trying to tell me anything through the countless signs that he has been giving me.

Yesterday was one that was totally unexpected, one that set my heart racing, one that just pumped mere adrenaline. And then I thought to myself, “Dear God, what are you trying to tell me?”

Yesterday night made me realise that I’m still very reliant on the people around me. And my moods drastically change because of them. I mean, of course that person has to carry a certain amount of weight in my heart to be able to alter my emotions just by talking, and letting me know that they’re doing fine. Wow.

Dear God, are you saying things to me? You know my desires and my future is in your hands. But everything seems so, grey-ish now. I trust in you, I trust in you.

yeah, you weigh a lot.

2009-07-10T08:08:00.003-07:00

I said it many times and I'll say it again.

I was thinking today, after what Rie and I talked about. And yeah.
I'm not only confusing her, I think I'm confusing myself even more.
So yes, I don't know whether it still is or not but whatever it may be, my conclusion is that:

I promise you I'd stay, even if the rain falls today.

No more hiding from this. God allows this to happen for a reason and I would think that he would want me to face it with an open mindset, face it with a heart that yearns after him and not anything else. Whatever will happen, will happen eventually. I'm tired, so I shall embrace this with courage even though I know that I will fail at times. In fact, many times.

Hide and seek is child's play now.

Dear Lord, thank you.

2009-07-09T06:27:00.000-07:00

Eh girls, move away from here. Here got a bit of fever!

MC makes me laugh. Teehee.

OHMYGOSH. SO RETARDEEEEEED SERIOUSLY.
FOANG LINKED RIE'S BLOG AS HTTP://BARBIE.EVERYTHINGGIRL.COM/. BIG NEWS BIG NEWS.

When I saw it, I couldn't stop laughing. Seriously! Ohmygosh. No wonder they were laughing so badly in MOS.

School is getting funnier and funnier by the day. Filled with so many funny things that are just worth blogging about.

Went for lunch/dinner with Foang and Rice today. We talked about retarted stuff and serious stuff as well. I really really thank God for the both of them who have been helping me along all this while. And yeah, they are just wonderful.

Thank God for good results in Bio, Thank God for wonderful friends, Thank God for everything and anything.

God answers prayer, I know.

Okays, me shall go now.

Yes, I still.

2009-07-08T06:43:00.000-07:00

What a joke.

Highlights for today:
------------
IN THE MORNING:

JACQ: Ohmygosh! You know the hot guy, he was on the bus today again! *smiles broadly*
ME: JACQQ??!!!
JACQ: What?! I'm just admiring God's creation!
-----------
RECESS IN CLASS.
-----------
EMATH LESSON:

SarahT was hiding from MrsL under the table because she she didn't finish her work.
-----------
ENGLISH LESSON:

stuff/that kinda thing/that kinda look.
----------
AFTER SCHOOL:

SarahC: Hello excuse me, can you not speak chinese? This is a non-chinese zone!
--------

Haha. It may not sound funny typewritten. But, it's hilarious in class. Teeheee.

BIO TEST TMR.

Dear Lord, you know how I'm feeling. I pray that you will help me to trust in you no matter what happens. I pray that you will show me clear signs about the things that I have been praying about. Also, that you will help me to understand why certain things happen and for what reason they happen for. Help me not to lose faith, not to lose hope. Amen.

2009-07-06T06:29:00.000-07:00

My dear, Jesus is more than just a crutch.

Life is full of oxymorons, seriously.
I have come to realise that this passive nature is not going to help at all.
I'm so.. bleaughed. Confused more like.

You don't let your heart lead you, because your heart is deceitful. You've got to lead your heart.

2009-07-02T06:45:00.000-07:00

Bravo, mothball!

Read an extract of the Butterfly Frolick today. It was quite a good piece with dry wit and stuff.
We were anticipating the arrival of Jane Eeyre but she didn't come :(
She's arriving next week.

Blahh. Blooh. Blehh.

Dear God, please give me patience.

a thousand years wouldn't mean a thing.

2009-07-01T06:52:00.000-07:00

You'll be in my heart, no matter what they say.

Our family is going Japan crazy now. Haha, its like, jap food, jap food and more jap food. Its a yaye thing though. :)

Class was quite funny today cause the back row gang had like, retarded conversations.

Jia Min: Eh, I heard ah. If you cut an earthworm right, it will become two earthworms?
Wen Hsi: Huh? Really meh?
Me: Haha, if I cut you into two, you will also become two Jia Mins, just that you die what.
Jia Min: Nono, I mean, the earth worm will regrow back into two earthworms.
Celeste: Yeah yeah, really!
Wen Hsi: Eh? How does the earthworm shit ah?
Jia Min: HAHA, eh, I also don't know leh. How you know which end is the head, and which hand is the backside ah?
Celeste: I know! Why don't you go ask the worm? But must make sure you talk to it on both ends, cause you don't know which is the head, which is the butt.
All: HAHHAHAA.
Me: Okay, I'm going to blog about this.

Haha, it kinda dawned on me that I'm going to miss 4e4 loads.
Ohyeah. Jia Min gets really tickled by the english practice that we did in class.

"The durian dropped on the girl's head but she couldn't scream because she was mute." - courtesy of Su Young.

Okay, thats all for now. Tired. :(

been waiting far too long.

2009-06-30T07:11:00.000-07:00

In my life, I have loved them all.

2009-06-26T06:31:00.000-07:00

I"m 16 today.

So, I decided to thank many people for helping me through my 15 years of my life. And I hope, will be there forever too. Yep. Its going to be rather long. So, please bear with me. :D

DADDY AND MOMMY: Thank you for being there all the time, even when I threw my tempers and stuff. :D I love both of you.

JOEL: HAHA, thank you, brother. For being such a blur brother. Haha, you've brought much joy into my life, even though you annoy me.. quite a lot. :D But yes, I love you too.

JUSTYN: Hey Justoh! HAHA, thanks for being such a wonderful cousin, talking to me and cooking food for me! HAHA, you wonderful cousin! :D
JEROME: Hey Gege, thank you so so so much for accompanying me whenever I felt bored in your house and stuff. Thanks for teaching me how to play the guitar. And, thanks for being such a great listening ear and source of encouragement whenever I felt down and low in spirit. Thanks for sharing stuff with me too!

RIE ONG: HAHA, thank you so much for being such a wonderful friend to me. I can not tell you how much I really thank you for everything you've done for me. And yeah. THANK YOU GIRL. You are seriously awesome. :D

BOFOANG: Haha, thank you so much dear! For being such a great friend and helping me through everything. Gosh, haha. I don't know what to say. But, really. Thank you for every single thing you have done for me!

SARAH: Hey dear. Haha, thank you so so much for talking to me during chinese class, I think we've grown closer through these two years and I really thank God for you. Yep! Thank you for listening to all my rubbish and everything, and being such a great EXCO member!

BETTY: HAHA, hey betty. Haha, thank you so much for being there during the Malacca CIP trip. I will never forget your bread! HAHA! THANK YOU!

LYNETTE: HAHA, thank you girl, for being such a wonderful Vice-Head to work with throughout the past year. Really couldn't have done many things without you! :D THANK YOU!

ANNABELLA: Heyho! Thanks for being such a wonderful ELDDS head! And a spectacularly wonderful friend too! :D YAYE thank you for makine me laughh. :D

SAHIDAH, SHERYL, SINDHYA, JACQUELINE: HEYHEY! Thanks for being such dears in class. Even though I have no nag at you all a lot. But yes, its a jo to talk to all of you and get to know you all. :D

IAN: HEYHEY. HAHA, I don't know what to say to you man. But, yeah. Thanks so much for how you have encouraged me throughout everything and helped me throughout everything. Well well, don't worry, I will beat you in the bubble breaker game the next time! Yep. So yeah, thanks so much for everything that you have blessed me with!

SA PEOPLE: Hey guys, thanks for being such wonderful people to work with during the outing last year. I'll never forget the fun and laughter and all the rubbish that we talked about during meetings and stuff! :D THANK YOU!

KAI LIN: GIRLLLL. haha, thanks so much man. You know what, I'm not going to say stuff to you here. Because, I've got other stuff to say to you. HAHA. But really, thanks for helping me and encouraging me through everything! :D

DIANE: HAHAA. You look funny in this picture! But anyways, thanks so much for being such a dear to me. You've been there throughout everything. AND, haha. Thanks for being a good neighbour who's like, one flight of stairs away from me!

WEI YEE: heyyy. HAHA, thanks for helping me for worship and stoning with me on many many occasions and stuff like that. HAHA, doing worship with you is really very fulfilling. So yes, we shall continue okay? :D

KAREN: heyyyy! HAHA. YOU WONDERFUL YOUTH LEADER. haha, thanks for being such a great youth leader in PHOS and being such a wonderful mentor to me as well, always being there to check if I'm okay and stuff like that. AND, always singing me happy bday through the phone!

DARRYL, YASUSHI, ABEL, MARCUS, JOEL: Hey guys, even though not all your photos are here, thanks so much for bringing joy and laughter into the cell! :D HAHA, I really can't imagine cell group without all of you!

CALEB: Hey, thanks for bieng a good MSN and SMS companion to talk to, encouraging me with verses and stuff like that! :D HAHA, its been really great talking to you and all. THANK YOU!

TIM: HAHA, I don't know what to say to you. But, thank you for remembering my bday, and being a good friend! :D

THERN YANG: Hey, thanks for being a good ex-tuition friend. HAHA, sounds quite funny. But, ohwell. Yepyep! Wishing you all the best, and thanks for everything.

YU XIN: Hey! Thanks for being such a wonderful companion during tuition since pri 3 :D HAHA, we'll strive hard to get our A1s for HMT okay? :D

Thank you everyone else who has wished me happy bday and stuff like that! Okay, I'm going to post this now. If not its going to be 12 in like, a few minutes!

THANK YOU!

Love,

Samantha

2009-06-24T22:36:00.000-07:00

16 tmr.

I had a nightmare yesterday. It wasn't anything like monsters chasing me or evil witches and stuff. It was just, a scary dream which concerned my future. I really wonder if God was trying to tell me anything through that. Cause, I've been troubled over that for quite a whille.

But I shall remember that in everything, by prayer and petition, submit it to God.

Yesterday Daddy talked to me about it. And it just struck me because like, 5 seconds ago, I was thinking of the same thing. Yeah, so it was kinda freaky.

Ohwells.

16 tmr. Doesn't feel very much special actually. I'm just glad I'm growing healthily with family and friends along with me.

my God is a God who provides.

2009-06-24T07:43:00.000-07:00

HAHA. Funny funny.

Was watching this show. I don't know what its called. Its just funny. As in, not the cute cute cartoon funny. But, just funny.

Last night was rather emotional. I was just browsing through random stuff when I chanced upon my old box of letters. So I took them out for a brief read and couldn't sleep after that. So, at about 12, I started writing letters and stuff until about 1230, when I finally went to sleep. I was really tempted to call people to talk it out. But, ohwells.

Dear God, that if it is your will, you will show me clear signs. You know whats best and I trust that you will bring me through this. Help me not to waver but to keep my head clear, and know what I'm feeling and thinking about. Amen.

2009-06-21T05:56:00.000-07:00

HAHA. I SAW STH I SHOULDN'T HAVE SEEN.

Just watched Finding Nemo. And Dory is super funny. We just keep swimming swimming.
But it was meaningful. As in, it captured the essence of Father's Day and stuff like that.

BTW, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DADDY.
Haha, I'm typing this cause I'm quite sure that my dad will read my blog. Just for fun.

Daddy, Mommy and Joel came back on Friday. And now Joel is suspected of HFMD. Really pray that he'll be alright. Even though he looks perfectly normal to me. And for everyone else who is suspected of HFMD or already has HFMD that God will continue to heal them so that they can come back to church soon.

Well well, went for dinner at Jack's Place for Father's day celebration on Saturday. It was quite good. And then Daddy bought me this like, red data traveller thingy thingy to store my documents cause the previous one crashed. But I like it. Its nice and red, though the free pouch they gave looked rather weird even though it was supposed to cost, $20 or sth like that. I think it looks better without the pouch actually.

Then we went for my grand uncle's wake. Or rather, my mom's uncle's wake. He passed away cause of cancer. It was quite sad but, death is just another phase in life, isn't it?

Joel and I saw a very different wake setting as what we usually saw. Daddy brought us to the back to see this big and huge house thingy that was bigger than me. I guess its some chinese belief that burning the big house would mean that my grand uncle would live in that house after he enters the underworld and stuff like that. Quite interesting, but spooky at the same time.

OHYEAH. There was a huge influx of Gigantor Ants. And I'm not exaggerating. It was huge. Its like, the size of a normal flying ant, just that its bigger by 20 times. I think we were the only table that was screaming. Funny.

And, my brother is currently obsessed with Table Tennis. He's like, playing table tennis everyday with my aunty and my parents and me with the small coffee table that's just in front of the TV. Haha, as funny as this sounds, I'm going to miss my brother once he grows older. :(

Let's see, is there anything else? Ohyeah, got a pack of UNO cards today. Winnie the Pooh. HAHA. It was funny, really. Thanks anyways!

AND AND AND. Sorry. HAHA, You probably think I'm weird typing this line. But really. Heh. :D

Kk, I shall go now. I think tmr is going to be quite.. interesting.

Goodbye!

gonna bring an anthem of love!

2009-06-18T07:58:00.000-07:00

VIVALARIE.

Hello world. I'm back after days of planning and running around Singapore for 17/06/09.
Well well, HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIE AND VIVIENNE.

Collaborated with Gracia, Eve, Dominic and Kenneth for the bday thing. Hope Rie had a pleasant surprise :D And then, planning with other people as well. It was really, great. As in, had a great time talking to them and all that kinda stuff.

Okay, I actually got a lot of things to blog about. But, must have the mood. And, now.. I don't really have any mood. So yeah. Haha.

Bye!

its the green-eyed monster :(

2009-06-14T08:06:00.000-07:00

Hello World.

I realised I've been having random ppl tagging my blog. Hey, anonymous ppl, you should seriously write down your name. If not I can't reply your tags and stuff like that.

Well well,

HAPPY BDAY VIVIENNE. Haha, yes, I know you read my blog. Happy bday Bofoang! :D I know I keep getting your name wrong. But hey, you can rmb me better through this, right?
Anyways, praying that you'll grow in wisdom and stature. Keep fighting hard, studying hard, playing hard.

Kai's staying in my house for 1 week, cause our parents all went up to Malaysia. So, yeah. I guess its a blessing, cause we haven't got time to catch up in a while, and its good quality studying time spent together.

Can't wait for Wednesday. I think its going to be hectic, but nevertheless, yaye. I can practically see myself beaming on Tuesday night when I finish chinese tuition. Yayeness!

Okay, I think I shall go now. Kai is like, sleeping alr. Hehe. Church retreat ppl, have fun ya. :D
Ohyea. Did I say? I failed Caleb's quiz horribly. Haha, 20%. I'm quite proud of it actually. Nah, I'm joking.

Bye!

you make me laugh, really.

2009-06-12T07:08:00.000-07:00

Its been a year.

Wow. Haha, I don't know what to say, really. I'm just overwhelmed with emotions.
Well well, time flies. Things change, people change.. Haha, I sound as though I'm being melodramatic. But really, everything I wanna say, everything that I'm thinking about is all in my mind.

Well, I guess it was an experience and I never regretted it. I made many friends along the way.

2009-06-11T07:23:00.000-07:00

I was that close to screaming.

Dear God, please help me. :(

I'll be handing it in tmr and I really pray that God will allow it to find favour with the people who look at that brown envelope. Well, even though I know there are great possibilities of it not getting accepted, I'll just trust that its God's plan and ultimately, he wants the best for me.

I was talking to Rie on the train today, about how fast time passes and its been a year since then. I have no idea how I'm going to live through tmr. But, I will. I mean, its been rather long. Time to let go, isn't it? But then again, I was telling Rie that I'm really looking forward to what happens in about 3 to 4 years down the road. Like, the day when I get a message or a call that will just bring a smile onto my face. If that day comes, then I will know why God made me go through all these and why he allowed things to happen. Similarly, if it doesn't happen, I'll just trust.

Well, today kinda reassured me that there will not be a possibility of anything like that. Simply because, the differences are too vast. And perhaps because of my personal issues. But really, swearing is something I don't like. And its something I will never like. So, there isn't a point in this at all. But sadly, I'm the only one who sees it.

Yup. I'm feeling better now. (in case you didn't realise i wasn't feeling very happy). Yuh, can't wait for the 17th.

Alrights, shall say bye now. Bye!

I realised that its not that easy to accept a person as she is.

2009-06-03T06:26:00.000-07:00

Haha, that's enough emo posts for now.

I realised that everytime I come to blog, its always about things that are troubling me. Which isn't really a good thing because it sort of affects the people who read my blog. I mean, people who were actually happy read my blog and feel all morbid and sore about it. Thats not a very nice thing to do I guess. So I decided like, 1 second ago that I shall blog about something more light-hearted today. On one hand, its to make people happy, and the other its to ease my 'troubles' whatever.

Lessons have been going on as usual. Its been pretty alright I guess. SS lessons on Monday were great. Mr A. was super funny. We were talking about Venice and sutff related to that. And he was saying something about having to get yourself a 'master' or sth like that in order to be a professional in a certain career. So he said..

MrA: " so when people ask a master to teach them something, they are called the...?"
Class: "disciple!"
MrA: " disciple is for kungffuuuu la."
Su Young: " follower!"
MrA: "yeah yeah, you all take up your crosses and follow me la."
Class: HAHAHAHA.

Somehow it seems that holiday lessons are more, light-hearted. Maybe its the way people are dressed? Like, not as formal and stuff so theres a more affectionate tone and atmosphere that goes around.

Man, can't wait for the jacket design to be out. Check it out yo! (HAHA, 4e4 inside joke) Hilarious manxzzxx.

I seriously can't wait for next week. I actually think I'm beginning to go mad.

Anyways, we went for Chelsey's bday party last Sat. And we went near to ROM. Evangeline that dummy, didn't bring me flowers :( HAHA, I'm only typing this here cause she doesn't read it. HAHA. She's a real pppoootoot la. Haha, cute.

Well, its like, 2134 and I'm actually feeling tired. Signs of ageing and depression. V.bad, v.bad. Kai's bday is coming. AHHH.

Alrightys, shall go now.

Btw, thank you daddy and mommy, for your encouragement(:

Dear God, you know everything that is going on, and everything that will happen. I pray that you will take control of everything. Especially what is bothering me right now. I pray that you will give me the peace that I need, to know that everything will be alright with you by my side. Help me not to be disappointed if I don't get what I want but trust that you have an even greater plan for me. Help me put my human pride away. Amen.

2009-06-01T07:13:00.000-07:00

Friendship is not just based on empty words. You need to use actions to prove it.

You've been through much more than me, you've seen more than me too. Why is it that our understanding of this seems to be so shallow. Ohgosh. I feel like a professor trying to lecture you about what friendship is when in fact, it should be the other way round, shouldn't it? if you're reading this, i really hope you get what i'm trying to say.

Okay, maybe before I start blaming others, I should ask myself if I'm being fair. Yeah okay. I think I don't quite fully understand what the word 'friends' entails.

Sometimes I really feel like a hypocrite, asking people to trust, yet I myself am lacking in faith.

Dear God, I know you planned this. And I've been asking you about it over and over again. Is this your answer?

2009-05-28T06:41:00.000-07:00

Love made perfect in weakness.

Haha, you know, sometimes I get really annoyed with myself. As in like, I know that certain things that I read will make me feel sad, whatever. But, I still read them nevertheless. I can't believe this. I'm starting to annoy myself. Haha, talk about loving yourself, eh?

When I was walking from the bus stop to west mall today, I sorta realised how fast time has past. And how I've been lagging behind. I just got reminded that I have prelims in like, 3 months. And here I am still blogging. Haha, sheer irony.

Well well, today was kind of a miracle. Before I went online, I prayed a little prayer to God. And, he answered me but with an answer that was super vague. As in, I can't even make sense out of it. I was just scrolling down the contact list, looking at who was online and.. gosh. It was rather unbelievable. I'm not going to type it out here cause its embarassing. As in, its a very small thing, as small as a green pea or sth. But, somehow it just struck me. *tring*

Tmr is the official last day of school. But, doesn't seem like much of a difference for the sec4s cause we've got lessons running for the first 2 weeks of holiday. But thank God MT intensives are ending tmr. Cause I'm going mad. What happened during MT intensive today made me realise that everyone has his/her limit. And will blow if you take too much advantage. I felt really bad. But, thankfully all is okay now.

Anyways, I went to see monkeys yesterday. Went to Teacher's Union for dinner. And there was this group of crazy guys singing and dancing near the swimming pool area. It was, HAHA. Funny. My brother and I were like.. *stare* HAHHA. Then we went to look at the number of dead flies there were in the swimming pool which was just plain disgusting.

Yep, and at night, my dad had this totally weird convo with his student. It went like this.

ringringringring....

Daddy: Hello?
Student: Hello Mr Chua.
Daddy: Who are you? Are you Poh Kai Xiang?
Student: Yes..
Daddy: OH! POH KAI XIANG AH. I ask you to call me why you so late then call?
Student: I was at child care.
Daddy: AIYOH. Mr Chua VERY WORRIED about you. I thought you got kidnapped leh. You didn't get kidnapped ah?
Student: HAHA. no la.
Daddy: Aiyoh, why you never get kidnapped? Nobody want you ah?

HAHAHA. My dad is seriously a joker la.

Okay, I'm going to stop here for now. Got stuff to settle.

Bye!

Hey, I said whatever I wanted to say on MSN k? But really, I owe you a bigger apology than you owe me. So, please don't say sorry to me anymore k? :D You've been a great friend to have and, I couldn't have done it without you. HAHA, btw, I didn't use yellow because you wouldn't be able to see. But, orange is almost near yellow la.

2009-05-27T07:00:00.000-07:00

All that I cling to, I lay at your feet. Your grace is sufficient for me.

Haha, I don't know why, random songs just keep popping into my head these few days. MYEs have made me realise one thing. I really need tp rely more on God and less on myself. As in, on Friday, I really thought it was going to be the end of all my hopes. But somehow these few days God has been so great, giving me the peace and joy that I need to conquer all the problems that I will be facing. Sounds like I'm anticipating many challenges, yes?

I really thank God for friends who've been so encouraging. I mean, canteen sessions with the 'post-it' gang has been really great. I genuinely am reminded of why God put friends in my life for. And I guess what Bofoang said was right. That people may be friends, but it doesn't mean that they have to talk every single day. I guess I need to get that engraved in my mind.

Yep, I told my mom that I was feeling inferior to my brother who's great in almost everything. And she told me not to compare myself with him because we're both special in our own ways. And even though I still felt a bit lousy about it, God told me something through a message in my phone. I was browsing through my inbox and I saw Karen's devotional which said that God crafted each and every one of us to be perfect in his eyes. So, I guess that eased all my worries about me not being able to match up with my oh-so-smart brother. Well, I'm happy for him. And I really hope he keeps it up.

The past few days has set me thinking whether I'm putting too much pressure on myself. And what Lao shi said today was very valid. That, pressure is good. But, I'm putting too much of it on myself and that's going to be bad. So, I need to stop thinking that I can't do it. But, just focus on doing my best. If not, the psychological barrier thingy thingy is going to remain there forever.

Okay, I know whatever I'm saying makes me sound like a lunatic who's going mad. But, I'm not. Its just that, things around me have been changing so fast, I kinda got lost in the hurlyburly of it all. But, I will pick myself up. I must.

Yup. So for now, life goes on as per normal. Just that.. okay. Nevermind. I shall go now, and spend time with God.

But but but, before that,

NATANIAAA, haha. Yes, I know. But, MYEs are rather crucial for me. Especially cause I studied for it. And the results aren't showing any signs of my effort at all. So its just, demoralising la. But, I tell you okay. Prelims will be better. If I don't cut my L1R5 by half during prelims right, then I'm so dead. So yes, I'll be keeping you in prayer (:

Alrights, Byebye.

I may not know, but I'm sure God knows.

2009-05-25T07:12:00.000-07:00

It wasn't that bad after all.

Got back a few results today. And, it was disappointing but at the same time, quite encouraging. I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm just praying that tmr will be better. But for now, I've got things which are bugging me even more.

Its not that I'm losing faith, whatever. Its just that you aren't there. I mean, what kind of friend claims to be one when you're not even there to listen? I really don't know how long more I can keep this up. But I'm just trusting that God knows whatever is going through your mind, whatever is going through my mind.

But on the other hand, God has blessed me with others that I cannot possibly thank in words. Thanks Yam.

And thanks Rie, Bofoang and Sarah for your notes of encouragement and sms after Friday when my water works started again. Gosh, I can't imagine life without all 3 of you. Man, I really got to work hard. If not I won't be able to get to JC with all 3 of you together. :(

Okay, I shall go and sleep to rid my mind off all these annoying little things. Ohwait, its not little. Its quite big. But still.

Byebye.

Father, you are king above the storm. I will be still & know you are God.

2009-05-24T06:44:00.000-07:00

Bad day at school on Friday.

I really didn't expect this to happen. I don't know what to say. But I just feel like rambling on and on and on and on and on. How could I have let this happen to myself? Seriously, I've got to do sth about this.

I went to school kinda happy, thinking that MSND would bring me some joy. But my hopes were kinda crushed in the morning. I was really looking forward to it, but it seemed like God closed the door. And then, the things that happened in the afternoon didn't make it much better. I tried not to. But I just couldn't help it. I'm not meeting my own expectations, others' expectations and it makes me feel really lousy.

I know I should be feeling happy inside, and trust me, I am. But theres this part of me which keeps asking why others can when I can't. Is it because I haven't been giving my best? Perhaps. But honestly, I don't know what to do anymore.

By right, I should be stressed cause my parents won't be happy with this. But I told them and they were rather encouraging. But I feel even worse now, because they trusted me but I wasn't able to do as well as I wanted to.

Dear God, I know you're there.

Sermon today was really refreshing and it was very appropriate for my situation now. God has 4 different answers when we pray to him. Its either a 'no', 'wait', 'yes' or 'I have a greater plan'. After listening to it, I was confused for a while because I don't know whether my prayer requests are inappropriate or just not in accordance to God's will.

Somehow after the entire sermon, I felt tugged. Like what the bible said, 'Do not be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition, surrender it to God." Honestly, its so hard to surrender now. But, I will just try. And if I don't get it, I'll take it as a clear signal that God is saying 'NO' to me. And I shouldn't be so stubborn anymore.

Sometimes I really wish I was living in the past.

Dear God, I can't do this on my own. You know what's best.

2009-05-21T07:09:00.000-07:00

Hello!

I haven't been here in a thousand million years. HAHA, guess what. I dropped my computer on the flooor. I'm super smart la. Yeah, some metal part came out. And yes, I'm using my parent's and my brother's laptop now.

Ohwell, mid years are over and, haha. No comments. As in, I've been hearing things from teachers, and its scary. Seriously. Must work harder! Must work harder! But as of now, my mind is preoccupied with so many activities that will be coming along in the month of June. I'll just take one step at a time.

Chinese intensives are killing me. Its zapping up my brain juice. :( We're writing like, 3 compos per day. And we have 5 hours of chinese on average every single day. Blah. I shall not lament. Chinese is good for the soul. its good for the soul.

We had an hour of lunch break today and I was talking to Sarah, Rie and Bofoang in the canteen. It somehow made me realise how much I will miss the school and all the funny laughter and chatter, especially with the 3 of them. Can't imagine life without them, seriously.

Watching AMSND tmr and Sarah is like, jealous to the max. Cause, ahem ahem. I shall respect her privacy here. But yeah, kinda looking forward to it. P. Lit all the way! I'll have to navigate my own way home though. Urghhh.

Yep. Its getting late. Need to go rest cause I have to prepare myself to embrace many more hours of chinese tmr! Thank Goodness theres Adam Khoo's booster session tmr. Relieves a few hours of chinese. HAHA.

Alright, byebye.

Wait wait!

NATANIAAA: I know you're reading this. HELLLOOO. Ohmygoodness, I've got stuff to tell you. So you better fly back soon. I miss you loads la. :( See? Now I got nobody to write letters to anymore. Even though you sorta scared me when you wrote to me in sec1. But, ANYWAYS. COME BACK SOOOON. I'm waiting for Os to end so you can come back. Study hard yes? :D

we're of different levels now, its just that maybe i'm the only one who realised it.

2009-05-17T07:58:00.000-07:00

If anyone would understand that, you would.

Its like a glimpse of hope at the end of every tunnel, a light ray.

I was watching the Amazing Race today. Haha, it was quite funny cause I was laughing even though it was quite an intense competition. I think I'm quite weird, really. But, the show sorta made me realise that you can never know a person well enough. No matter how close you are, its just a surface view and everything.

Bible Study on Saturday was.. refreshing. We touched on the topic of loving others. I mean, loving even the irritating people who are around me. And I guess it was really apt for me, especially at this time when I'm faced with people who are just, unlovable.

Tolerance, Samantha. Tolerance.

Ohwells, I'm getting tired and sleepy now.

Byebye.

Ok, I'm not the abnormal one here.

2009-05-14T07:20:00.000-07:00

Announcement: EXAMS ARE OVER.

Next announcement: THAT WAS ONLY MID-YEARS

Following announcement: YOU STILL HAVE PRELIMS

Last announcement: O LEVELS ARE STILL WAITING FOR YOU

Ohgosh, annoying! But, ohwell, I definitely feel much better now. Went out with Jacq, Sind, Sher and Sah today. Haha, it was, tiring. Did so many things like, cycling and all. Haha, I never dreamt that I would actually go out with them. But, its real funto hang out with different people.

HAHA, Sindhya is a superrr camwhore. She camwhores like nobody's buisness okay. Haha, Sheryl also. But, its also them which brings the fun to the group. Yeah, we were doing super embarassing things like, doing cartwheels on the beach. I think Sheryl took a vid. Sheryl Foo, you better not upload it. Its super.. eeew.

Anyways, I've decided to enjoy my temporary freedom (as what Veno said) from now until Tuesday when marking days are over. Honestly, this Mid year exams were, uhm. Indescribable. As in, especially for A math. I tell you, I loooovvveee A math. (yeahright) gosh, you know I even dream of my teacher asking me to drop the subject. I don't know, maybe I'm just not cut out for it.

Blah, its like, 1026. haha, I know it sounds early. But I'm tired, so I'm going to sleep. Anyways, tmr! :D NE quiz and so much more. As funny as it sounds, I'm looking forward to NE quiz.

Yep, finally tonight I can sleep without anxiety.

Goodnight.

everything in my life is willed to God, every plan I have is in God. faith.

2009-05-11T06:01:00.000-07:00

God is the strength of my heart.

I WAS feeling happy earlier. But now, I'm not feeling that great anymore.
Tsk, I hate playing hide and seek. Gosh, in case you didn't realise, I've been trying to tell you.

Dear God, help me.

2009-05-08T07:11:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry, you're just not.

MYESSS are almost over. Okay, the keyword is over. I know this isn't really the right attitude to be adopting, but honestly, I feel super relieved. Well, major reason because Bio paper is over. The entire week I was just fretting over the Bio paper and how I was going to die cause I wasn't prepared for it. But, its really God's grace that I managed to do it and actually feel rather good about it.

The past few days/ about a week or so has really been so tiring. Like, emotionally, physically. Somehow, it just occurs to me that people need God and without God, life is just meaningless. I've been asking God to help me and provide me with strength to go through this entire episode. Yes, it works. But, nevertheless. Furthermore with the addition of some people, it just gets frustrating at times.

Gosh, I don't wish to be unfair, but I don't want to disillusion you into believing anything as well. Either way, I won't be fair to you. Cause, I'm not giving you a chance, neither do I want to treat you as a substitute product because thats just pure.. inhumanity. I'm still human btw. Which is why.. stop being so nice! It ain't worth your time, at all.

Lalala, haha, let's talk about MYES now. Uh, I went home on Thursday and told my mom that I confirm fail A math. I'm not demeaning myself or anything. But, I know myself. And yes, I don't think I can pass. Not like I've ever passed A math before anyways. When I was doing my paper, I was so compelled to going to tell the teacher that I wanna drop A math. Simply because its taking a toll on me, and I'm so sick of it. I don't know whats my problem, I just can't seem to do it during exams. But in real practice, I seem absolutely fine. Okay, you know what, I'm just way weird.

Anyways, I'm dead tired. Going to sleep.

Nights!

It had to be you!

2009-04-27T06:56:00.000-07:00

You are our king.

I am awed at what God has done for me, and I trust that he will continue to do so for the both of us. I know you're reading this, and yes, its for you to read.

"God has given you the ability to go through every situation that he puts you in."

I like what was said during devotion this morning. And, Sunday during worship, the song that spoke to me.

There is no mountain too tall,

He cannot move it.

There is no sorrow too deep,

He cannot soothe it.

If he carried the weight of the World,

Upon his shoulders.

I know my brother/sister,

That he will carry you too.

Well, God wants to teach me something from this, something that I don't know, yet. But for now, I'll just keep praying that God will lead us through and trust that he'll bring us there when the time comes, if he planned for it to happen.

I'm sure it won't be easy. For me at least, I don't think it'll be easy for you either. Time time.

Aiyah, you know what. You should go create a blog. Cause then I can go read your blog and know how you're feeling and all.

Alright, I shall continue another time. Sleepy :(

Nights!

yes, i still do.

2009-04-23T06:04:00.001-07:00

silver!

Its okay, we'll do better next time round.

Okay, we got a silver for SYF. Well, kinda expected a silver. But, of course, a Gold would have made us feel more justified for all the hard work we put in. But, ohwell, its a good improvement from the previous SYF.

Saw a few juniors today and they were all like.. SILVERRR??!!! I went like, yes. Silver. But, when I come back in two years time, you all are going to get Gold with HONOURS. And they were like, sure! Haha, that's the spirit (:

Its okay, ELDDS, we've all learnt much. I've learnt.. A LOT. Love you all <3!

Next Headline:

english mye is tmr.

let me repeat that. Its, TMR! Haha, amazingly, I'm still blogging. Gosh. Okay. I'm sleeping early today.

Yeah, class was rather enjoyable today. The back row is quite entertaining, really. With JM, Wen Hsi, Celeste and Katherine there. Haha.

I got so restless in class today that during free time, I was singing the snow white and seven dwarfs song. HEIGH-HOOO. JM was laughing like mad. Then suddenly, Wen Hsi, who happens to be VERY tall, went like.. "My snow white and 7 dwarfs collection spoil leh. Turned mouldy."

All of us were laughing like mad, cause we couldn't picture the super TALL Wen Hsi, watching snow white and the 7 DWARFS and collecting the figurines. Sheer irony man.

Ohwells, I still can't believe Wen Hsi is a dippy. That smart girl.

Kk, I should stop now.

ENGLISH, I LOVE YOU.

okay. enough man. we'll settle this soon.

2009-04-22T06:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, I've got to admit, I'm not ready for this at all. Past few days I've been thinking about how mature I've grown to be over the past few years. But today, I finally realised one thing. God isn't through with me yet. He hasn't moulded me into the person he desires me to be.

It really feels like crap when you're confused/stressed. Especially when you need someone to talk to, but somehow the person you have in mind doesn't seem to care. Okay, I'm not pinpointing or whatever la. But really.

I'm really tired okay. I've got enough. Enough of finding lame and stupid answers to convince myself, enough of everything. Even the calmest person on Earth can blow at times. Sometimes I really wish everything could alakazam and zap itself away.

Gosh, I find myself to hypocritical at times. I keep saying, "O levels come first, O levels come first." But kinda think of it, there are other things that are still weighing on my mind. I'm being super general here and not pointing to anything else.

I was putting much thought to whatever happened in the past year, what I could have done better, what I shouldn't have done and so on. Even though they all say its good enough to do your best. But honestly, its not a nice feeling to know that you have fallen short of expectations and things have come to a certain state because of you.

I'm not going to blame you nor anyone else. But I'm just going to trust that God planned this all out. And through this, the thickest piece of metal can become a needle.

For now, I'm just worried about SYF results which are coming out tmr. Plus, Mid Years which are like.. in a week's time. Excluding Enlgish which is.. the day after tmr.

BTW, I'm not emo-ing. I'm just.. reflecting.

Dear God, please help me.

At the peak, falling.

2009-04-15T06:48:00.000-07:00

we'll fly them way up someday.

Hello. Life is great! (yeah right). No, but really, I'm not joking. Life really does get great when you perceive it in the right way.

These few days have been days filled with intruiging thoughts. And I've come to realise that you can't make things go your way all the time.

You see, flowers are essential to peoples' lives and decor. But living without a flower can't be that bad, can it? Besides, a flower that you really like is worth waiting for. They don't bloom just because they want to. You need to wait for them, just like you have to wait patiently for every other thing that comes your way.

Care is good, yes. But excessive care of another flower is just going to drown it.

I know you don't understand what I'm talking about. But, its just a way to let it out, without the entire World understanding.

Alrights, I shall go now.

Dear God, flowers bloom everyday. Help me to realise which is the one that is right and not any other wild flower that comes into view. I pray that others too, will understand where I'm coming from. Amen.

then one day, you shall see.

2009-04-12T07:10:00.000-07:00

love crucified arose,

I haven't been here in ages. Because, I'm lazy and tired. Haha, or rather, cause I have been really busy. But now, I'm not so anymore since SYF and Prefect's Commendation are over already. Man, I'm going to have to get used to life without CCA and Prefect's stuff cause both of them are integral parts of them. Ohwell, but as what people always say, all good things must come to an end.

Well, past year as HP has been just great and fulfilling and I wouldn't ask for anything more. I was crying during the school hymn in Prefect's com. No idea why, but it was just.. sad and sentimental. I guess I'll elaborate more another time.

Thank you EXCO for being so great. I really don't know what to say. But I am sure that we have all done our best and that is good enough. Okay, I shall not self-reproach anymore. Its very bad for the soul. Blahh. If theres one thing I learnt from all these, its just to rely on God to see you through it all.

I think what the bishop said was really apt. We all need to surrender ourselves holy, for God to craft us into what he intended us to be like. Yes, he will put pressure on you. But ultimately, you'll be that vase of great use, that vessel of great blessing to those around.

Well, past few days haven't been very good cause I've been asking myself stupid questions. And all these just lead to the point that I don't trust God enough. I'm not intending to write everything here cause its all personal stuff.

Uh, I'm not pissed at you or with you or with anyone else. I'm just irritated and frustrated with myself. How could I have done such foolish things and actually think that it would get pass without any glitches along the way? Thats just total naive thinking. Yes, I did pre-empt things like these to happen. But, so fast? Maybe.

Ohman, I've got enough of this. Enough, I need a break. But sadly, I'm not giving myself the chance to have one. And besides, I don't need this right now. I've got more important things to think about. Okay, stop. Stop.

Alright, so much for the melodramatic part of the post.

---- change mood -----

AH! You know what, we had chicken with brandy for dinner. And I think I'm drunk. Nah, I'm joking. Haha. But seriously. It was rather bitter and.. wine-ish.

Ohwell, I think I shall stop now.

Bye!

God loves me, I know.

2009-04-05T07:22:00.000-07:00

I would be lying if I said I didn't miss you &, I don't like lying.

This coming week would mark the most important time in my.. Secondary School life, (other than academically). Honestly, I'm supposed to feel relieved, but I'm not feeling it at all.

Tuesday SYF, Thursday Prefect's Commendation. I'm ready for this. Ohwait, am I?

The past year has just zoomed by so fast and I've been occupied by so many things around. But now, I'm leaving these things. I guess its part and parcel, no one can enjoy good stuff forever, (except for the love of God.)

I'll talk more about this again simply because I'm tired. Like, physically and especially emotionally. I know I need to. But, I don't want to and, I can't.

Aiyah, okay. Sam, forget these things first. Focus on this week.

Ohyeah, did I tell you? I have NAPFA tmr. And, I DON'T LIKE NAPFA:(

Dear God, thank you for your love that is far greater than anyone else's love. Others may verbally say that they could die for you, but you proved it by sending your son who you loved more than yourself. Help me to realise that love is not just a word to be uttered whenever the situation calls for it. But a feeling of security, hope and warmth, the feeling that only you can carry through best. Help me to know that human love is but just a mere part of life, but your love is the whole and all kinds of love comes through you and you will bless it if I honour you first. Amen.

2009-03-31T06:45:00.000-07:00

Its the last lap.

SYF is coming, so is commendation. So many things, so little time. We had our rehearsal at CJC today. Really big place, we had to wear costumes and all. Photos are on facebook people!

Today, Rie stuffed 53 pins into my head. As in, my hair just to make the head gear thingy stay. Amazing. HAHA.

I'm falling sick again! SYF is like, next week but I'm falling sick.

Its going to be April tmr. Its really scary how time passes isn't it? Haha, I find myself constantly contradicting myself. First I say that time passes very fast. Then in my mind I'm thinking that time will pass very slowly (if you get what I'm referring to.)

Ohwells, went to see the new born baby on Saturday and Sunday. She sleeps a lottt. Like, drinking milk halfway and then she slept. Heh. Anyways, had a good talk with Jerome as usual, and talked to him about certain things which we had in common.

Whatever he said held truth. "If you worry so much, then that just goes to show that you don't trust God. Cause if you trust God then you should just leave it all to him even though you know its going to be very hard."

So, I guess thats rather self-explainatory. Everything I need, I have, I want is all in God's time. SAMANTHA. Stop worrying.

Okay, I'm really sleepy and sneezy. Shall go now.

Byebye!

because thats the way love is.

2009-03-26T07:22:00.000-07:00

Its nearing, its nearing.

SYF and Prefect's Commendation in the same week. Rah, scary isn't it. Somehow I feel as though I still have a lot of time before I step down. Wake up Sam, its less than 2 weeks. (I think).

Man, I finally finished writing my speech for commendation. It was rather hard to pen down, honestly. Simply because I have too much to say and I didn't know where to start. But now that I have reflected about it all, it was worth it. It still is. Man, I'm going to miss the board.

The ACJC-ers came back to school on Wednesday (Tabitha, Jessica, Eve etc.) Had a good talk with Tabitha, updating her on what has been happening in my life and all. She was rather, shocked I guess. So many things have happened. Its been like, 2 months and 2 days since that day. I can't believe I keep track about these kinda things.

Yeah, I took a bus back with her. We were talking about JC choices and I was sharing with her my worry that I won't be able to get into AC nor SA. Which is really, urgh, bugging me. And she kinda assured me. But still, she worked hard for her results. Now its my turn.

Well, we were talking about PB as well, and how our journeys have been really fulfilling. I don't think I wanna go into details cause my feelings are just, indescribable.

I think the most I will miss about St. Margs is the room. Ohwells. I'm really tired actually, waiting for it to be over, to start a new phase in life.
Gosh, there are so many things I'm waiting for.

Okay, reminder, being able to wait is a blessing in itself.

Yeah, I shall stop here. RIE ONG, get well soon!

talktalktalk. where are you?

2009-03-23T07:09:00.000-07:00

love never fails, let go and let God, he knows best.

Haha, ohman, its my brother's birthday tmr! Ahhh.

Had some party like thingy for him on Saturday. People were supposed to crash, but they didn't. Urgh. Ohwells.

I was looking through some facebook photos. And guess what! I realised I have no social life. But, nvm. I will find one after O levels. Grr.

Ah, SYF preview tmr. Scream sam, scream. You're supposed to be scary. Do it. :D

Anyways, the main thingy of this post is to thank God for blessing me with such a great cousin. I was talking to Jerome on Saturday when he was at my house. It was really a great comfort to know that I wasn't facing problems all alone and all.

To have someone who could understand from my point of view and perhaps guide me in the same way was just amazing. God is really good.

I said to him, "Yeah, I know. I keep telling myself that love is patient, patient, patient."

And then he said to me, "Sam, you're using your own strength and thats not what God wants. He needs you to let go, no matter how difficult it is. Let go because he knows whats coming up for you. You'll wait, I'm sure. But till then, leave it to God."

Man, its such a blessing.

Actually, waiting in itself is considered as a blessing already. To me at least. For now, I'll busy myself with SYF and Prefects Com. But after that, O levels!

Daddy said something to me in the car today which made a lot of sense.. "Self-discipline without a goal or aim is self-torture." When I heard it I went like.. whatt. But after much thought, it does make sense. I need to think where I wanna go to, what I'm aiming for after Sec School education and all.

7 months and 3 days. 7 months and 3 days.

Alright, I shall stop here for now then.

Goodbye people.

I never dreamt that flowers would be so important.

2009-03-16T06:56:00.000-07:00

Yeah yeah, okay

Haha, kinda think of it, its so laughable. Honestly, I thank God that I won't be directly in charge of this. Because I'll just be like. Uhhhhh.. Uhh... Uhhhhhhh. Seriously, sarcasm is not the way to go.

Ohwell, all is good. (I hope) I realised that how I feel really depends on who I talk to, how people react to me. Well, there are pros and cons to it. I mean, its good to react to people and situations. But, it gets tiring. Very tiring.

Moving on, I really need to focus, think through about who my Syf character is. I can't be making the same excuses which stuns my performance. Its the last thing I can do for Eldds, I have to do this well. Stop laughing sam, stop laughing. You are mean and scary, mean and scary. Ohman, I need to stop being that 'samantha-possesed mother kim' Rahhh. I'm scary. Hear me roar. Are you terrified? Muahaha. OKAY. Lame much.

Rah, I guess everyone is getting tired, and this is getting mechanical. But, I will enjoy this, I will.

Alrights, I shall go now. CCA prac tmr again. OH! Do you know, I've got a twisted wrist and I can't open my mouth properly for some reason. Ohman, I am just weird.

FRIDAYYYY. FRIDDAAAAAYY. Please don't disappoint. (:

because God's love never fails.

2009-03-14T07:20:00.000-07:00

Heh, term 1 is over. Which means that I have not much time before MYEs, Prelims, and finally, Os. I was thinking to myself, if everyone else can do it, why can't I? Okay, and my answer is probably because I haven't been trying hard enough.

Yup, been thinking a lot lately. And yeah, I realised the importance of people in other's lives. I thank God for you. (:

"Its enough for me." oh. really?
As seasons change, people change. Only God remains.

2009-03-08T06:30:00.000-07:00

I have not been here for ages. And this place is collecting dust. Nah, joking. But, I don't really think people read this blog. Its like, maximum boredom.

My my, things have been happening at such a fast pace, I can't even keep up. Its like, into school and out of school. Reach home, study, sleep. Really can't wait for the 1 week March Hols breather. Not like it'll be very relaxing. But, it still brings anticipation.

I have no idea what is going on at all, and I am totally confused. Hah, but I shall not let it bother me. After all, this year is Os. Rawr, I'm not scared of you, Exams. You're just a piece of paper. I'll make sure I get to cut you up with a scissors. Okay, I am so weird.

So, I shall talk about Sat and Sun since its the only two days where I remember what happened. Had CCA as usual on Saturday. SYF is coming, in a month. Exactly. I'm rather worried, honestly. Cause, my voice is too high apparently. And, I need to talk in a lower tone. Rie told me to go take guy hormones. -.- Yeah, I went with her to Ikea for hotdogs and chocolate and went to church. The topic for Cell discussion was rather refreshing, it was about PMS. (Pre-Marital Sx) We had debates about the issue and all. And I think I took a lot back with me that day. At least I managed to sort out all my grey areas. As much as its going to hurt, its what pleases God. And I will go ahead with it.

Sunday. (Today) Rather monotonous I guess. Wei Yee and I went for lunch with the Sec1s. Haha, cause of our siblings. So, we just went along with them. Nothing much I guess. But I was really tired. Got back home and slept for a while, and then I had a drink before going to war with A math. Fought it for a while, exhausted all my questions. And taadaa, here I am!

Yeah, so that was about it for this entire week. Having A math test again tmr. And sports day on the 12th.

Ohyeah, I wanna share this thingy to encourage people who read my blog. Haha, not like there are many. But yeah. Its part of a song which goes..
'Your love, surrounded me from the start. I never want to be apart, from you ever again.' We sang this during worship today and I was touched by it because it reminded me of how God loved me from the start even when I broke his heart over and over again.

Uhmm, yeah. So I guess thats all la. I shall not continue. Getting tired. Bye(:

read deeper, more intently, you'll see what I mean.

2009-02-25T05:23:00.000-08:00

How could greater love than this, ever possibly exist?

As much as I don't like this, life goes on.

Haha, I wonder when my blog started becoming so morbid. Okay, maybe its just me and my random mood swings and all.

Things have been happening and all I can say is that God still remains faithful. Weeks haven't been great and it still remains the same. I realised how much of an impact people can make on others. And thus, I have made it a point to make sure I catch up with friends every once in a while because communication is the bridge between people in distance.

I read my devotional yesterday night and which was rather encouraging. It talked about how Naomi, even in her complaint, never lost sight of the fact that her God was a capable, all knowing and faithful God. And indeed, he proved His capability to her and His faithfulness to care for her right to the very end. Naomi even referred to God as Shaddai Yahweh. Shaddai referring to God's sufficiency in every situation and Yahweh refering to His faithfulness as a loving covenant keeping God.

Yeah, my prayer last night was that I would look towards the future, with the knowledge that God holds my future in His hands. As much as I don't want to worry about it, I still do and I guess thats human instinct. In the midst of all the things that I am facing now, I really pray that my communication with God will not be sacrificed because, as what I said, communication is an essential for every working relationship. Same goes for God and us (myself).

Well, I read through many reflections today and it really made me wonder what I have been doing for the past year. Until I get the answer, I will keep thinking and asking myself where I have gone wrong and what I have done well in.

Yup, during class for the past few weeks, I've been taking down funny conversations that occur in class. Reason being, I want to keep myself occupied so I don't think of unecessary things during class.

So, heres one.

Katherine: Samantha, I have two words for you.... I love you.
Me: Thats like.. three words?
Katherine: Thats because you and I are one.
Me: *stares in astonishment*

Alright, I shall stop here.

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
- Von Schlegel

2009-02-22T05:42:00.000-08:00

Yeah okay, maybe, maybe not.

Common tests are over. I'm quite glad. But, this is just common tests. What lies ahead is way more. Got the O level verfication slip already. And I've got 3 writing intensive papers on the same day. Lit1, Lit2 and Bio2. I'll just leave that be.

For now, I feel like the the World's greatest idiot. Okay, sorry. Crude word. But honestly. Maybe I was just dumb, and I still am. I'm not losing faith in you. I'm losing faith in myself.

Dear God, please help me. Things aren't going the way I expected them to. I really feel urgh right now. Only you know whats going on. Amen.

2009-02-18T05:51:00.000-08:00

You are stronger.

I haven't been here in ages, simply because its common test week. Haha, I've got, 2 more to go. Somehow, work keeps piling up and up. Its quite scary really. We've got this countdown thing in class. And its only about 75 or 76 days away from MYES and another 200+ days to 'Os'.

Gosh. Ohwell, its a cycle that everyone has to go through.
Note to self: A math and Chemistry will not give up on you, unless you give up on them.

I love A math and Chem. (howfake) But, really. Even if I don't now, I'm making an effort to. At least, I'm coping alright with this year's A math syllabus. Sec3 A math is killing me though. Its okay, I'm too young to die.

Haha, you know, I realised that I've been trying to phrase my posts in a very politically correct tone and manner to make it seem as though I'm like, mature in thought. Haha, a load of rubbish man. Samantha, Samantha. Tsktsk. Haha, so, ohwell. I'm just going to type whatever I feel like typing. Simply because.. I want to! Yeah, but of course there will be times where I emo abit. Like, type vague stuff here and there. But hey, the thrill is trying to decipher what I'm talking about, isn't it? Ohman, I've got such a blown up ego.

Yeah, can't wait for this weekend. E-learning days are coming. Yup, I shall stop now and dream of economic/social/environmental impacts.

Ohoh! Before that, this is what Sarah said during chinese class.

Sarah: Ohman, Sam! I'm getting pimples.
Me: Yeah right Sarah.
Sarah: I PRAY AGAINST ANY PIMPLES. THANK YOU JESUS, AMEN.
Me: SARAHHHHH. HAHAHA.

Okay, haha, it was funny to me at least.

Alright, byebye.

I miss talking to you, really.

2009-02-15T05:49:00.000-08:00

In every season, I know you love me.

Valentine's day is over. Hmm, I don't really have much to say about valentine's day since I have never commemorated it before.

This year was pretty special cause Valentine's day captured the essence of true friendship instead of bgr and stuff. Big thank you to R & T. You two are greaaattt. (: I really thought I couldn't handle it. But, I'm really glad that I could in the end. And in fact, it was even better than I expected. Like what they always say, God doesn't put you in situations that you cannot handle.

Yeah, yesterday was Diane's birthday, today is Siran's birthday. HAPPY BDAY both of you.

For now, I'm feeling bleaugh. I mean, yes, yes of course. But, argh. Okay stopppp. There shouldn't be but-s in this.

Alright, shall stop here. Common test weeeeek.

love is patient

2009-02-12T06:11:00.000-08:00

Haha, hello. Its the 12th today.

I spent my day at home, staring into space, trying to occupy my mind. Yeah. I realised that as people grow older, they tend to appreciate school better.

Ohwell. Rie probably knows how I'm feeling and what I would really like to type here. But, because of reasons, I'm not allowed to do so. So, I'll just keep it within me.

Haha, so much for losing count, eh?

2009-02-09T05:47:00.000-08:00

Your grace is sufficient for me.

Bio SPA and A math test is finally over. Alas. Yesterday I felt horrible. Now I'm feeling better. Even though I'm about a hundred percent sure that I won't do well for A math.

Somehow, I've got this feeling that God is trying to tell me something. I heard this verse 3 times in less than 24 hours.

2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

I heard this verse over the phone last night, this morning during devotion as well as during singspiration. Honestly, I've looked at this verse quite a few times but, never have I really thought about what this verse meant to me.

I guess God is trying to tell me that his grace is indeed sufficient and I need not have to worry unecessarily (which is what I do all the time). Ohman, I sound like some faithless creature.

Your grace is sufficient for me, your strength is made perfect, when I am weak. All I have needed, I lay at your feet. Your grace is sufficient for me.

Trust God. Thats what I need to do.

2009-02-08T05:56:00.001-08:00

I lay it at your feet, Lord.

Ohman. Bio SPA and A math test tmr. :(
Its quite scary cause I don't wanna fail A math anymore. I've sick of it. Ughh. Okay, I love A math. I love A math. I love A math.

Hmm, this coming week is lovey dovey week. I shall try to love every single person. Today I realised the importance of a certain kind of love relationship- friendship. I shall elaborate.. some other time cause I'm currently brain dead.

Alright, I shall stop here. BIO SPA AND A MATHHHHHHHHHH, don't kill me please. :(

Bye!

Dear Lord, thank you for wonderful friends. Amen.

2009-02-01T06:01:00.000-08:00

Be in my heart, be in my life, glorify for all to see.

Its been, 1 week or so. And, I'm okay I guess. Feeling better of course. (: Just constantly have to find things to occupy myself. But it isn't a bad thing. Cause, I'm having Os this year. And occupying myself with studies will do good.

Chinese new year passed like a breeze. It was so.. I don't know how to describe it. But somehow as people grow older, fesitvals don't seem to have such a great impact anymore. Ohwell. I sound like some 60 year old lady.

Castings for SYF were out yesterday. Okay, I was shocked that I got a role. And a matriach figure at that. I wanted shihwei to get it. After all, she's the one with the assertive voice and all. Rah. I really do hope that I will be able to pull it off and juggle my studies at the same time. Thats my primary concern for SYF this year. Both are important to me. Hah, looks like I'll be too busy to even think of other things.

I guess things happen for many different reasons and God knows everything that will happen. I said goodbye to 2008 in great anticipation of 2009. Now that its here, haha, I'm speechless.

I experienced love for 15 years of my life. Just that I haven't been very much reciprocative of it. God loves each and everyone of us much more than anyone could ever fathom. Nothing you can do, could make him love you more. Such is God's love. (:

Another week is here. Meeting Natalie and Sean tmr. After 5 years or so. Really can't wait. Its long-lost cousin bonding time.

Dear God, help me to love the way you first loved me.

2009-01-25T00:23:00.000-08:00

Heh, it happened.

As much as I was dreading this day, it really came. Yeah okay, it doesn't feel good. But I trust that every decision was made after much thought and I'm not the only one feeling this way. I respect the maturity level that has been reflected. And thus, I have come to a decision.

I'll wait, because I don't see a reason not to.

Take comfort, my friend. For as each day passes, God does the things he deems best for you.

2009-01-22T05:16:00.000-08:00

School has just been so fast-paced. Its like, sec4 life. I keep going to school with this mindset that I'm only sec3 and I've got a lot of time before Os. But, I'm going to be 16 this year. Is that scary or what?

You know, its rather scary sometimes when you start to realise that you're merely just existing instead of living. I'm filled with anticipation/excitement/fear of what the near future is going to bring. Heh, I'm going to have to constantly remind myself that things that happen now, will reap its benefits in the future.

Okay, I'm going to stop here. Bye(:

2009-01-14T04:56:00.000-08:00

14 January. Eventful day. Okay, this is so stupid, I'm trying to be happy when I'm obviously not. Gosh, you know what. I don't feel like talking about this at all.

BLAAAAHHHHHHH.

Dear Lord, please help me to remember that you have a plan for everything.

2009-01-06T06:11:00.000-08:00

Stand by me.

Orientation is over. Gosh, its really amazing, how we've been plannig since October and now its just over. And I enjoyed myself.

Today was an eye opener to many new things that I have been missing on. I realised that its not only being the hands that matter. Its the head that needs to lead the rest of the body along. And honestly speaking, I think I have been the hands and feet for too long and I need to stop doing that. Today was really a day of reflection and thinking about what went wrong and how we could have prevented such a thing from happening. I guess we all have to learn to work in synch with each other. And we will work on it, and I will do my best as well. Well, as the saying goes, once bitten twice shy. Such a thing will not happen again.

Yup, nevertheless, I really hope the sec1s had fun getting used to the whole St. Marg's culture and stuff. I'm quite sure the EXCO and facils will be hearing from them since they all asked for our emails and stuff like that.

Alright, here are some pictures from our random lunch outing at Ikea on 4th Jan. (Happy Birthday Darryl Lim)

shark attacking wei yee
okay, then it came to find me

gardeners, anyone?

Haha, any resemblence? (yes, I know I look like a pig.)

Alright, I shall leave you now. Long day tmr.

Things happen for a reason, and this time, its a good reason.

2008-12-30T06:17:00.000-08:00

Theres no higher sacrifice.

Hellos, I'm back again with a few photos from the HK/Macau/ShenZhen/ZhuHai trip. So, yeah. You can just take a look. Cause pictures paint a thousand words (:

Haha, this was the coolest ever. 15 mins inside a hamster ball.
Taadaaa! Me insidethe hamster ball. (: (I was scared)

This is funny, it was super hard to move. I feel sad for hamsters.

Okay, my brother has occasional spasms as well (:

The two guys in hoods were acting cool. Hehe.

My family in Macau

Justyn and I

My family with.. the funny photographer in HK

Haha, my brother carrying me. We went around carrying people (:

Justyn and I again. (:

SWING! In ShenZhen's tourist attraction.

Joel, Me and Justyn in Zhu Hai.

Gege and I in Zhu Hai. Haha, most people thought he was Korean.

Okay, my turn to carry my bro. (:

Alright, so that was just a few pictures. I've been overwhelmed by many many thoughts that I can't possibly type out here. But, I will if I feel compelled to. Yup. Enjoy your last few moments of 2008!

Thank you, Lord.

2008-12-28T05:58:00.000-08:00

You are my world.

Firstly, MERRY CHRISTMAS'08. Okay, I'm sorry I'm late.

Hello world, I haven't been here in ages. And it feels abit funny. But, nevertheless, I'll just blog briefly (: I just came back from Hong Kong. Its cold. Really cold. It was quite a good time of fun with the whole family. Just that, I missed Singapore and the people here.

Anyways! I got some pictures from Siran's blog about YWAV camp and Christmas/Rachel/SamZou's bday celebrations.

Move with my i.P.O.D camp 08!
Me with WY's pig in the classroom.

Phos girls :D

Phos!

Haha, this year's YWAV camp was really good. It was about the Intentional Process Of Discipleship (i.P.O.D). But, it was quite a pity cause I wasn't able to listen to the whole series of sermons cause of school. Gosh, this year's games, were totally.. uh. Okay, rather expected since Caleb, Zach and Lejon planned it. I guess everyone enjoyed themselves even though we got dirty, stinky, wet and muddy.

Yup, so, now for how I spent christmas!

We went to Plaza Sing to celebrate SamZou's birthday after service. So, we treated him to Swensens. (: Happy Birthday SAMZZ.

swensens! me, marcus, abel.

wei yee, siran, darryl

Sam and Sam! Yaye!

Haha, after service, cutting cake for Rachel. (:

Happy birthday!

Yup, next time I'll post about HK trip. But, not all the pics la. I'll go mad. Yup!

Bye!

Love is patient

2008-12-03T02:29:00.000-08:00

What's happening? Gosh, is it them? Or maybe its just me.

2008-11-30T05:32:00.000-08:00

Bring me to my knees, Lord I lay me down.

Hellos. Wow, I haven't been here in a long time eh. So, I'm back. The past week was really way packed. Like, zoomzoomzoom. But, it was worthwhile. Thursday was fun. But rather embarassing as well. Tsk. Gosh, I can't believe its on facebook. There goes my reputation. But anyways, thats not the point!

I have a story to share today. A totally lame one. One which I made up. (which explains why its so lame) Yeah. Here goes. This is specially dedicated to RieOng.

Once upon a time, in the clear blue waters, lived a pair of fish. This pair of fish were of the same kind. And together, they were called the Dorrie fish. In case you're wondering, the Dorrie fish is a high class version of the Dory fish that you see in the supermarkets. So, this Dorrie fish couple, could never be separated, for their love was too strong! And nothing could break them apart.

So, one day, on the Dorrie fish's 1000000000000 year anniversary, Dore (the male fish) said to Rie (the female fish),

Dore: Dear, shall we go for an adventure? Lets swim to the Pacific Ocean! Then we can become Pacific Dorrie fish!

Rie: Alright dear, anything you say. I'll just follow you.

So this romantic couple went and headed to the Pacific Ocean. However, on their way there, there was a horrible demon, named Domoooonuk who came and tried to steal Rie away! Dore was traumatized because he knew he could not lose his one true love, Rie!

Dore said, "I will fight against anyone who tries to steal her away!" So, he started to bite the rope which Domoooonuk used to capture Rie. Alas, the rope snapped, and the Dorrie couple was saved.

Well, as of now, the story is still in progress. So, please stay tuned for more updates! :D

Right, that was just the lame part. Okay. Now for the more serious part. Yayeness, I have survived like, 6 days already. Heh. Yup! Can't wait. Can't wait!

Ohyeah! We went shopping today. And we finally got clothes for my Godbrother's wedding! Yaye.

Alright, I think I should stop here. And I'll end today's post with a prayer.

Father Lord, thank you for showing me how prayer works and how you never fail to answer us. A few days ago, I asked for you to guide all those near you towards you and now, you did it. Thank you for how great your love is. That even when I thought it would never happen, you made it happen. Thank you for testing my faith and proving to me that you are indeed almighty and everything good comes from you. I pray now, that you will use me to be an instrument of peace towards everyone who's around me. That you will prompt me to lead my life as a testimony for you. Amen.

When one is saved, all the heavens rejoice and be glad. (:

2008-11-26T05:06:00.000-08:00

It will never end, I pray.

Hellos. (:
I haven't been blogging in ages. Haha, I think I said this before. I'm just being lazy and everything. Goshness. Somethings wrong with me. Anyways, about 2 days have past. I'm waiting for next tuesday to come. Ohwait, when next tuesday comes, I'll be elated. But then, I'll be sad too. Its like, ones back. But the other is leaving. Rah.

Today, we went to Sentosa. We meaning.. Daddy, Mommy, Joel, Justyn and me. Yup, it was a family outing thing. They wanted to go to the LUGE in Sentosa. So, we just went. Haha, it was rather fun. And, everyone was rather high-spirited and everything. It was a good day out as a family. We haven't done that in ages.

Let me narrate this funny convo that we had over lunch.

Dad: Sam, you need to be more hardworking and work harder! Study harder.
Me: But, I already am!
Joel: Yeah righhttt.
Me: Joel, at least I study more than you.
Dad: People like us who are not that smart, need to work hard. For people like Mommy, she has to work even harder!!
Me and Joel: HAHAHAHAHAH.
Mom: EDDY CHUA, what did you say huhhhh?

Gosh, funny much. Anyways, we went to sit some 4D magix thing. It was quite cool. Yup. So, thats about all for today. Pictures say a thousand words, my pictures are all on facebook. So, haha. Go view them if you want.

Dear God, I pray that you will strengthen people during this time, that your comfort will be upon them and they will be encouraged by how great you are. I also pray for safety journey for those overseas, that you will watch over them and protect them, and bring them safely back home. Amen.

a few days left.

2008-11-23T17:11:00.000-08:00

Now, its all about you. (:

Hellos. I haven't really been blogging much. Because, I'm just lazy la. Hehe. Anyways. Keming Primary School Camp is over. Yeah, I had fun and difficulties with kids as well. It was an eye opener, really. I guess patience was something that I learnt. Gosh, I don't know how to elaborate on it, because its really a long story. But, overall, I had fun. And I hope the kids did and learnt something from it too.

Saturday was just, interesting. I realised the importance of people in my life. And, I realised how much God has blessed me. He has given me people whom I can trust, and more importantly, people whom I can love. Haha, once again, I am stunned for words. But, I was really touched by everything. The sweets, chocolates, hello pandas, tissue paper, water and most importantly, you. (:

Gosh, I don't know how I'm going to survive this week without feeling vibrations from my phone. :( Blah, I'm like.. self-psycho-ing myself that the week will fly past. Okay, smile! Smile! Rah.

Alright, I should stop here. Bye!

OHOH, congrats to Mr and Mrs Eric Chung! Wishing you two all the best (:

Though my world may fall, I'll never let you go.

2008-11-18T20:35:00.000-08:00

This is but just the start.

One day filled with memories. Gosh, I feel rather sad now. I mean, months of planning just for one day. And now, the day has past. But, nevertheless, I enjoyed myself. And I hope everyone of you involved enjoyed yourselves too.

We couldn't have done it without any one of you. You people are just great. And, God is great too. He gave us a favourable weather to carry out our activities.

I really don't know what else to say because everything is just inside of me. And I don't think I'll forget it. Happy early birthday to you. (:

You know what, I think I shall just stop here for now. I'll post later, if I get the time. Yup.

Dear God, I pray that you lead those in search of you, straight into your arms. I pray that you not let them wander, but keep their hearts close to yours. I pray that you will use me as a medium to help them find you. I know you love them, and I pray that they will continue to grow to love you. Amen.

But the greatest of these, is love.

2008-11-15T06:34:00.000-08:00

The chances of feeling the way, we do.

Rie: Gosh Sam, you're smiling like a nut.
Me: Heh, Rie, nuts don't smile. They don't have expressions.

Heys!

Finally back from Malacca CIP. Quite a fun-filled experience apart from the Hotels which were, uh. Okay, actually it wasn't all that bad, the both hotels were rather clean. Just that, having lived in luxury hotels for all my trips overseas, the Malacca hotels didn't really appeal to me. But, nevertheless, I had fun with my room mates, Rie and Elizabeth.

I think Elizabeth had a 'culture shock' after rooming with Rie and I for 4 nights. But, its quite cool cause she opened up a little more.

I realised one thing -- Rie is weird in the night. I'm not joking. Seriously, she goes mad and starts jumping on the bed and gets high on Choclairs that she eats like a running tap. Then she inverts my bear's head. And twists my monkey! Gosh, poor bear and IJ. Haha. But, rooming with her is like, just cool. :D

Haha, I really don't think you all wanna read about each day of the Malacca trip cause it'll seriously just bore you to death. Overall, I think I benefitted quite a lot from the trip, making new friends and just having the time of my life. It was rather sad that Ong and I were in different groups. But, nevertheless, I think it benefitted both of us postively. Or rather, it benefitted me. I learnt to be more self-reliant. And I guess that is really important.

Yup, painted a whole mural painting which was really.. whoah. It was 'high energy consumption'. But still, it was worth it when we saw the whole mural painting getting prettier and prettier by the hour. I think I enjoyed the visit to Agape Care Centre quite a lot. I was leading the kids in Song singing as well as Story Telling. Really quite an interesting experience. The kids there are so adorable. And the teacher is hip. Real modern and hip.

Alright, I think this was the most relaxing CIP trip ever. We got to go shopping every single day and even finish our work before hand. I guess throughout the trip I did quite a lot of self-reflection, which was immensely beneficial to me. I'll talk about it more some other time.

For now, I'm excited cause tmr is D-DAYY. Yaye, finallyyyy. Heh. So, till tmr then!

Dear God, teach me your ways, and show me your path so that I may be a blessing to those around me.

2008-11-10T06:51:00.000-08:00

Hey. I'll be in Malacca from the 11th to 15th November for school CIP trip.

Till then people!

Bye!

I'm going to miss everyone.

2008-11-09T06:06:00.000-08:00

And with every step together.

I haven't been blogging for a long time. So, this will be a long one I guess.

SATURDAY
Rie and BoFoang(viv) came to my house to do stuff today. It was quite hilarious really. Bofoang came later so Ong and I went to pick her. She stepped into my house, and then my Aunty let Waggy(dog) down onto the floor. Then Waggy came to Bofoang to smell her. And Bofoang screamed like nobody's buisness. Really, I think the people in Blk 201 could hear it too. It was scaryy. Thereafter, we went to bake chocolate cake. Okay, we were just bored. So bored until we decided to bake a cake. Haha. Hmm, the cake was not bad really. But it tasted better when it was cold.

Guess what, I got kidnapped in my own house. I got bound to my own bed, and deprived to speak through my own phone. Gosh, what is the World becoming into. Yeah, Bofoang and Ong decided not to allow me to speak to a certain someone. Tsk. Haha, ohwelll. Lamepok la those two. I think we made a lot of noise. Teeheee.

Yup, so Bofoang went home, Ong and I went to meet the Keming people for discussion. After that, I made my way to church.

Church was funny. We played double whacko with a baguette that was 3 days old. And, thanks to my very slow reflexes, I had to do the forfeit with Simon, who coincidentally also has very slow reflexes. Guess what our forfeit was? We had to eat that 3 day old baguette that was held bare, tossed and smacked onto sweaty people, and flung onto the floor by Kai. What a great forfeit, Wei Yee. She and her greatttt ideas. Yes, I ate the bread. It was, stale and hard. Really hard like a rockkk.

Haha, I played with my brother when I reached home. Quite fun, really. We played some board games. It sorta reminded me about how much I haven't had fun in a longgg time. Its time to take a break, and spend time with my brother. He was commenting on my school photos. He has loads of opinions on EVERY single photo that I ever take in my life. Tsk, brothers!

SUNDAY
Went to church as usual. The speaker was.. interesting I guess. Just that the topic didn't really appeal to me. It was about aliens and other UFO stuff. My whole bulletin was filled with alien cartoons. I created AZIPUKOMUNO the Alien and JELLYPUKOMUNO, the jellyfish. Hehe. I was just being childish (:

Yeah, slacked at the Oikos with WYee, Yamz and Timmy. It was funny, as usual. Yeah. It started to pour out of a sudden. So a few of us went out into the rain to save the kittens. They were really tiny. And they haven't even opened their eyes. Its quite sad to see them like that. Pray for them, please. (:

Yup, then we went to meet Pastor Elaine and went to have lunch with her and Uncle Jason at VivoCity. Haha, it was kinda funny. Cause we had a special guest. It was like, meet the pastor session kinda thing. Haha. Yup, we went to look around for flowery stuff for Bell and Eric's wedding. Ong Wei Yee spent 2 hours in the changing room, trying 3 dresses. Seriously. I'm not exaggerating! HAHA. It was hilarious really. And exasperating at certain points. And guess what! She didn't buy it in the end. Rah. I was like, WEI YEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

So, that was my weekend! Malacca on Tuesday. Heh.

Father Lord, please give strength, wisdom and comfort to those who call out to you. Amen.

My dearest pleasure, the light of His smile.

2008-11-05T02:28:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry if we haven't been able to leave an impression upon your heart. But, I won't give up just yet. Not yet. It's a fight to the finish.

We had chinese Os today. And hallelujah, its over. But, ohwell. Shall not think about it. I shall blog later, if I feel happy.

Bye!

2008-11-03T06:06:00.000-08:00

Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you.

I looked around my house today and I realised one thing - God has blessed me so richly. And very often, I have failed to see the things that he has blessed me with.

Maybe because this week is just passing by really slowly. Even though its only Monday, I can feel it. I'm wishing for this week to zoom past, and then the Malacca trip to zoom past so that when I come back, I'll be all in smiles. Yaye.

This week is what I call, testing week. Haha, simply because, we have 8 tests. And, I've got chinese O levels as well. Believe it or not, I'm feeling scared for chinese Os. I mean, yeah. Nobody really studies for chinese. But, its this nagging feeling that I get somehow or another. And, I think I've got some problem. I've got chem and lit tests tmr, yet I went to study bio. Gosh, am I just smart or what.

Okay, I shall not start emo-ing. Because emo-ing is bad for health. Haha, I made that up. But anyways! Yeah. Alright, I vividly remember telling myself that I must post about what Karen said during cell last week.

Karen: "Abel, you scared to pray for girl, ahh."

Gosh, hahaa.

Alright, shall stop now. Yaye for you, I feel happy for you, dear.

cause you know I can't smile without you.

2008-10-29T06:54:00.000-07:00

Because, you're one in a million.

Note to self: Positiveness is the key. Embrace positivity.

Anyways, I shall talk about happy things and not brood over sad things because its really the lamest thing I've ever heard in my life. Tskkkk. Anyways!

Morning, Prefect's Room.

Rie: Eeyur, don't want la. So GG leh.
Me: GG what?
Rie: Gan ga la. (chinese word, means embarrassing.)
Me: HAHAHA.

Before Literature class, outside my classroom.

Evangeline: I'm emo, and I like to cut myself (stern and emo face)
Me: WHATT.
Evangeline: Just joking!!! (the silly retarded face)
Me: HAHAHAH.

Recess, in the canteen.

1.
Vivienne: Is this a curry puff? What's inside?
Me: HUH? Did you just ask me whats INSIDE a CURRY PUFF?
Vivienne: Yeah, I mean...
Me: HAHAHAHA.

2.
Vivienne: Today like very boring leh.
Me: Is it?
Rie: Really meh?
Me: Let's sing the BINGO song.
Rie: Yeah!
Me: There once was a girl named Vivienne and she had a blahblah.
Rie: HAHAHA
Rie and I: _ _ _ _ _! _ _ _ _ _! _ _ _ _ _ and that was his name, oh.
Vivienne: (blushing) -.-

After school, in the bus (852)

Rie: Ah, I'm tired.
Me: Oh.
Rie: Actually, I'm not very tired but I'm so used to saying that I'm tired. So I'm just saying I'm tired cause I am used to being tired when I'm actually not very tired today.
Me: (pause) HAHAHAHA.

One day full of stupid conversations.

Guess what. I saw a LIMEGREEN spider today. And it was doing morning exercise in front of me. Technically, its called afternoon Taiji. Because it was in the afternoon. But seriously, you probably think I'm mad as you're reading this. But I'm serious okay. It was Lime Green. And it was exercising in front of me. I got so shocked that I jumped to another seat. And Rie said, "Gosh, I am utterly embarrassed." Really! How would you react if you saw a Lime Green spider doing exercise and stretching like mad in front of you. Obviously you run away laaaa.

Sigh, what an eventful day.

Countdown: 15 days.

Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just, see you tonight.

2008-10-28T06:47:00.000-07:00

Darling, you've got to stop this right now.

Gosh, sounds so American. So.. unlike me. Anyways, I feel suffocated. I mean, its a good thing. But, rah. Hey, I'm not the only one! Great expectations. Perhaps they're too great, eh?

Right, I'm going to sleep. Tmr will be a better day (:

COUNTDOWN: 16 DAYS to sunsets and stars.

I surrender to the King.

2008-10-27T06:43:00.000-07:00

Start a new fashion, wear your heart on your sleeve.

Do you know, the Prata Man, the prata man, the prata man!

Haha, Drama outing today.

Went to watch HSM3 with the Drama people. Quite an okay show. Except that some parts were just exaggerated. But there were nice and sweet parts as well. Mostly balanced out I guess.

Hui Er was just fawning over Zac Efron. Poor Jenny she was being punched and pinched. Haha.

Hui Er: ZAACCCCC!! (pinches Jenny)

Jennifer: Hui Er, can your love not be so painful?

Ohgosh, Rie and I laughed like mad.

Okay, the most unlucky thing that happened today:
MY SLIPPERS BROKE.

Seriously, it just POKed, and bye bye slippers. So, I limped my way home and everyone was looking at me with the.. weird look. Gosh, embarrassing. But, I reached home, alive. Heh.

I'm still waiting for ANNABELLA and HUI ER to send me the photos from the Drama Night. AHEM. Yes, so, keep waiting people! :D Joking. Nothing much to see anyways.

Okay, Rie is getting me really confused. I think she's the most complex creature on Earth.

love unfailing.

2008-10-24T07:16:00.001-07:00

ANNOUNCEMENT: DRAMA NIGHT TMR. AHHHHHH.

Gosh, its so fast! Rah! Ah! Rah! Blah! Scarryyyy. Anyways, we've all worked really hard. And we've all benefitted from it. Great job EL.

Alright, I'm going to sleep early (try) so that I can give my best 'scolding' tmr. :D

Eldds, can we fix this? Eldds, Yes we can! (bob the builder song) Haha, gosh, I can't believe I'm actually singing it. And you, yes you. Stop laughing at me. Teehee.

Bye!

in my life, your will be done.

2008-10-23T05:40:00.000-07:00

The rain never seems to stop, does it?

Gosh, real bad day in school today.

Okay, it wasn't bad. But, I guess everyone was just really tired and wearied out. I don't know, maybe its like what Miss Noraini calls it, 'jitters'. I can practically feel the stress right now. Its, scary really. Drama night rehearsals are really quite tiring, especially after a day of lessons and all. But, its not the drama night thats bugging me. Its everything else.

I don't know how to explain it, I just feel scared and intimidated. I think its more or less due to my skill of procrastination. I really need to change that.

Okay, its time for goal setting. Its a necessity right now. I don't want to end either of it with regrets. So great, I'm in a dilema now. I know whatever I'm saying doesn't make sense. But, it doesn't matter really.

Haha, it seems as though the weather isn't being much of a great help either, eh? It rains almost never ceasingly.

Alright, I shall stop thinking about this, and try to stay happy! Yaye.

Okay, this is something funny that my dad said,

Dad: "HAHA, you scardey cat right? Neh Neh Nee Boo Boo..."

Heh, talk about maturity. My dad's the greatest example to emulate :D

21 days, counting!

i thought ...

Your love makes me sing.

2008-10-21T07:09:00.000-07:00

You hold my dreams, and you have a plan.

Haha, these few days have been full of thinking and stuff. I mean, personally I have been thinking a lot. Which, is a good thing actually. Being introspective and all. But yeah, having reflected on this past year, gosh. Haha, I realised I haven't really done much.

Yeah, I'll talk about it more when I get the time to really relax. For now, Drama is just sucking up all my energy. Plus, preparations for Chinese O levels have started. So, its chinese compos everyday which really is quite a chore sometimes.

Drama night is cominggggg. This Saturday! I really do hope that we will be up to standard. Yup, Drama night really is a good way to bond the CCA together. Well, at least hanging out with Sec1s has helped me to find the 'child-like' side of me back.

Right, headstarts have started and yeah. Gosh, don't wanna talk about it. I just have to keep reminding myself about the goal ahead! 10 points for O levels, maybe lesser. At the rate I'm going now, seems highly impossible. I'll try though, I'll try.

For now, what I really wish for, is for time to pass quickly and that the remaining 23 days will just zoom past. I tell you, I'll be elated. Optimism Samantha, optimism is the key.

Yup, I think I shall stop here! Sec4s, if you're reading this, ALL THE BEST FOR O LEVELS!

The sunsets, stars and sunrises.

2008-10-15T05:46:00.000-07:00

Why do these things have to happen at the same time?

Please pray for my dog, he's got some skin infection thing. And, it looks painful. Thank you.

Rahhhh. That happened yesterday and this happens today. Whats next? Tsk.
Gosh, the whole world is going mad.

In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.

2008-10-14T07:09:00.001-07:00

Rah.

Bad day today. Okay, not totally bad. But, dissapointing I guess. At least, from my point of view. I really want to talk about it and spill everything out right here. But. Uhhhhhhhhhhh.

Blah. Blah. Blah. Talk about responsibility and respect. Gosh, I feel unfair. Really. Why is it that others have to do things for you? Honestly, I'm not against the whole idea or whatsoever. But, shouldn't there be at least a sense of fairness and say in the matter? BLAAHH. RAHH. BLEHH. BLOOH.

Okay, maybe I should think of it in another perspective. To quote what Daddy said, "Don't worry, God has a plan although it seems as though nothing is going right now." I should just trust, shouldn't I? Uh, me of little faith.

I need someone to blaaaahhhhh everything out. Gosh.

Okay, mood spoiler. I shall stop here and pray.

Note to self: Please remember not to become a bag of potato chips.

Dear God, I know you know whats going to happen. Please guide me, Amen.

2008-10-13T06:47:00.000-07:00

Hello. Rah, I'm tired. So, it'll be short today yes?

Okay, another day in school. I dread Mondays. Reallyyy. Cause its like, thousand days before Friday. And, we've got Chinese Intensives and Drama Intensive training in preparation for Drama night which got postponed till like.. 25 Oct.

So, everyday its just.. Chinese. Drama. Chinese. Drama. Chinese.

Next week, it'll be.. Headstarts. Drama. Headstarts. Drama. Headstarts.

Anyways, funny convo today.

Rie: I live everyday of my life, wondering when will be the end of the world you know! I still want to fall in love! And I still want to get marrieeddddd!

Me: HAHAH, did you just say that?

Rie: Yeah, I'm serious okay!

Haha, Rie is really funny I think. I guess, everything is just planned by God already. Just a matter of time. So, yup. I'll just trust God to lead me along.

Alright, tireed. I shall stop here.

Bye!

OHYESSSSS. HAPPY BELATED 12TH OCTOBER!
(I'm weird, I like the number 12)

Two, in love can make it.

2008-10-12T04:01:00.000-07:00

Because of you(:

Okay, this post was due yesterday. But, I was just being lazzyyy. Heh.

HELLOOO PEOPLE! Guess what! Exams are O-V-E-R. Okay, actually, not exactly cause I've still got Chinese O levels to sit for. But, nevertheless, its something to rejoice about. Yup, I think I'll just blog about stuff that happened on Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Oh, but before that, I just realised that there are people who actually faithfully read my blog everyday. How interesting right! Thank you, I love you :D Right, let's continue.

I'll start from the back la. Which means, (SUNDAY)

Heh, its like, Siran's last day of church here before she goes back to Australia. So, we all went to Bugis Junction for lunch. Okay, we all got psychoed by Kai to eat that Omelette Rice thingy which was quite good actually. Yeah, we made a super huge load of noise. A LOT. Siran was going madd, together with all the girls and they were teasing me as though there was no tomorrow.

Siran (screaming loudly) : OHMYGOSH. SAM, YOU'RE PREGNANT?!

(Everybody around turns and stares at me)

Me: WHATTTT?!

Yup, there were many other spastic conversations which.. are just totally rubbish. So, thereafter we parted and I followed WYee all the way to Toa Payoh for some Caramel Milk Tea thingy. Okay, it was good (: I felt like a lamp post though (dian deng pao) HAHA.

Yup, so, thats about it. And, I have to save up to buy Kai her book which she was fantasizing over. Heh.

SATURDAY

It was an, interesting day with many interesting things that happened. Haha. I'm not going to write how I felt. But, its something positive. It helped me to, understand another better. And yes, I'm sure :D

Yup, after that interesting event, I went over to the Botanic Gardens for CIA picnic! Okay, pictures will tell it all.

Me, Siran and Wei Yee!

Thats our slippers :D

PHOS girls! <3

Guys. Haha, they were all like screaming "TAUPOK" and they started 'taupoking' Abel.

NATANNIIIAAA and I. Haha, (overgrown youth. Joking! :D)

Yeah, love the cell. Tiring though, all the Captains ball and Ultimate Frisbee stuff. Haha :D Thank God for them!

FRIDAY

Hmm, went to school for Drama. And then went out with Mommy. And then went to church for Jamming. Gosh, PHOS is so going to be the future Hillsongs/Planet Shakers/what not. We'll create the PHOS revolution in the world!

Yeah, then I got some funny message and.. Taadaa. Yaye!

After that, I went back to church for Adult's cell dinner thing. Haha :D Pictures again!

RYAN and I :D
JAMMMM.
Daniel
Joel.
US :D

I'm not in there cause I was in school U. Lazy to edit you see. :D

Alright, I shall stop here now. Heh.

BYE!

2008-10-09T16:17:00.001-07:00

You came along, just like a song(:

HAHAHAHAHA. yaye! Exams are over! Wheeeeeeee.

Anyways, I'm at Ong's house now. So, I'll just keep today's post short.

ANNOUCEMENTS:

1. I'm going to meet my husband and my daughter in about, 45 mins time.

2. RIE ONG is getting married in 45 mins time.

Okay, weird much.

Bye!

2008-09-30T07:05:00.000-07:00

Just to pour out my heart, and say that I love you.

Rah. Okay, not in the best of moods right no. I'm like, mood swinging. I think its cause of the weather and other unforseen circumstances which I have to comply with. Tsk. Haha. Okay. Note to self: I must stay happy. :D :D :D :D :D

Right, aiyah. I shall just continue tmr or something. Getting lazy.

Bye. (:

2008-09-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

Just to pour out my heart, and say that I love you.

Ello!, my blog has been dead for the longest time ever. I'm so sorry. But, aiyah. Doesn't make a difference. My blog doesn't have ardent fans who see check if I post every other day. I live a super montone life.

So lets see, what has happened so far? Haha, tons I tell you, tons. Just that, its personal. So, I shall not disclose it here. To protect my image (quoting Jessica).

So, highlight number 1. I got cheated. This certain someone cheated my feelings. I tell you. Keep reading on to find out who it is.

I have been.. studying hard I guess. Fairly hard enough. So, yup. Haha, other stuff I shall not elaborate. Cause I really can't remember what has happened for the past few weeks. So, I shall just briefly talk about this week. And, today!

Conversations between people are funny. Really. Take a look at this conversation between my parents. Its, quite retarded. This happened in the car, when Rie took a lift home.
Daddy: Dear, Pastor say you serving Lord's supper.
Mommy: Huh? Why ah? I'm not even a cell leader. You're the cell leader!
Daddy: Yeah, I know. I'm the CELL leader, you're the SIAO leader.
Mommy: Yeah yeah. I'm the SIAO leader's wife.
Rie and I: (stare at each other in a few seconds of silence.) HAHAHHAHA.

Alright, now, if you were wondering who cheated me, just take the first letter of each paragraph. (From the first paragraph to this paragraph) And you will have the name! Taadaaaa! Are you amazed by my creativity?!

Yup, so. Today is Saturday! We didn't have cell group. But we had study group. So, went to church to study. And then, haha, went out for dinner with Wei Yee's family. Yup! Haha, we went for some french cuisine thingy at Serene Centre. Then went to Island Creamery for ice-cream! Picture time!

Xin is very camera shy. Don't know why also. I think its the p6 thing. My brother is camera shy too.Wei Yee!

haha, retarded.

Strawberry sorbet and soursop!
Shuen in orange!
Yummy ice cream!

Yup, so, went home after that. Wei Yee owes me the ministry fair photos. Yeeeeeeee!

Ohyeah, I forgot to talk about this. I was browsing through my old phone yesterday. And yes, I have decided and I have moved on.

Kk, getting late! Shall stop here.

'I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word, I put my hope.' Psalm 130:5

2008-09-16T06:47:00.000-07:00

What a joke.

Sometimes I really wonder, what stops them from telling us. Its not like we didn't ask or we didn't clarify, right? Lets face it. It all boils down to the mindset. We can do whatever we can. But ultimately, its up to you. Its up to you. Gosh, I feel like rambling on, but I know I can't.

The whole world seems to be in a bad mood today. The world is weird, isn't it? Its like, things around are getting more and more ridiculous each day. First this, now that. Okay, I'm being super vague here. If you get what I'm talking about, good for you.

Okay, whatever man. We will do our best. And trust me, its not going to be easy. But, you'll have to co-operate with us too. Get it?

when troubles come, and my heart burdens me, dear Lord, I pray that you will be there to see us through.

Okay, I'm going to stop now. Haha, so not a good time to blog. Bye.

2008-09-12T07:34:00.000-07:00

You're the reason.

Wow, its the.. 12th of September. Fast huh. Amazing, I can't believe it myself. But hey! Its reality.

My, another week has just flown past me. I feel so.. under-accomplished. Rah. Exams are so near. But yet.. okay! Someone needs to slap me to wake me up now. What am I doinnnggg! Wasting my time! Tsktsk. Okay, I think from today onwards, I will blog less, study more, sleep more.

Yeah, this week was a rather challenging week. Or rather, it seemed to pass real slowly. Okay, maybe its just me. Blahh. I'm starting to sound like Evangeline. Haha. Anyways, I feel overwhelmed. Gosh, how did I spend my whole week? Let me think.. Actually, I reached home at about 4 plus everyday. Which gave me not much time to study. Besides, CCA exhausted my Thursday which I planned for proper study.

So, now! I've got tests coming up! Ohyaye! The best thing anyone could ever ask for! :D HAH.

I've got A math trigo, Pure Lit, Chemistry, Chinese. And, not forgetting that 'POP' quiz on respiration. Ah, great!

Aiyah, you probably get what I mean already. Haha, its like, guns pointing in my direction, just getting ready to shoot. Bang! Bang! When exams are over, trust me. I'm going to go mad. Ohwait. No, I won't go mad. I still got to take chinese O level exams. Haha.

Alright, lets not talk about such, depressing issues! Its time to take a look at some pictures.

Muahahaahahaha. If Rie sees this, she's going to keeeeeeel me. Haha.

On Wednesday, we went to WestMall, wanting to eat subway. But, we saw that it was all full and there were no seats for us. So, I said,

"Rie, lets take away and go to my house playground to eat!"

Her: "Sam, are you mad?"

Me: "Nono! I'm serious la. You want? Ohmy! So fun la!"

Her: "Huh, okay."

So, we bought our food and proceeded to the playground at my house.

Right, picture time!

Hehe, :D

Hello!
Haha, Rie is spastic la.
Ahaha. Rie's spasms again.
Subway!

Haha:D Cool huh. Rie kept saying, I cannot be spastic! I cannot! Then I was like, Yeah right la! She can do spastic stuff even better than me. Haha. I bet people from the student population who see this will go like.. "wow, they even have a life?"

Ahem. Ahem. We are normal kids okay! We make mistakes too. But we learn from them. Teehee. Okay, that was totally seld-praise la!

Hmm, getting tired already. I shall stop here.

Haha, happy three months people! :D:D:D

I love you endlessly.

2008-09-09T06:52:00.000-07:00

Hello people.

Yeah, okay. I know. I haven't been blogging. Haha, I think I'm starting to become old. Cause, old people tend to keep to themselves more. Ohman. Rah. Anyways! Exams are nearing. Great :D I don't know why, but this year. Everything seemed to have moved so fast. Like, zoom. And, its September already. I can still remember that day during Prefects Com. Haha, so.. what have I achieved so far? Good question. Let me think about it.

Monday, we had ELITES meeting. Well, it taught me a lot. On how to be a better leader. How a leader is defined by her actions and not her title. Really taught me to be humble. Humility. Wow. Yeah, I got rather 'crushed' when I heard that comment. Okay, I shall stay positive. We won't only make the difference. We will be the difference.

Haha, okay. I bet you didn't really understand what I was talking about. But, its okay(:

I was listening to CampRock song about 2 minutes ago. The one titled, This is me. Love the song, but.. I think God was trying to teach me something from that song. Haha, okay. I'm going to start 'preaching' again. Bear with me again okay?

I have to believe in myself, its the only way. I heard that line of the song, and then suddenly I went like.. whoah. Okay. Believing in yourself is good. But, its not the only way I guess. Cause, God is really the only way and the only one who you can draw strength from.

Gosh, there have been so many times when I try to take challenges and solve them by myself. But I tell you, it doesn't work. Don't try to psycho yourself into it. I mean, yeah. You have to believe in yourself and have self-confidence. But ultimately, you still need God before you can face that giant in your life. If my God is for me, tell me, who can be against me?

Right, so. I guess I shall stop here and continue blogging some other time. If I feel happy la. Or rather, if I have the time. Yup! Bye!

Ps: NATANNIIIAAA. I know you're reading my blog. tsktsk. Haha, hello there! :D

you're the voice inside of me, the reason why i'm singing.

2008-09-04T06:58:00.000-07:00

3rd September 2008. What an interesting day.

I woke up, hyped up cause I was going to meet Rie and go to the library to study! Cool right? Yeah, I met her at traffic light near my house when we saw this 1/4 girl. Haha, she saw us and then she went to hide from us. Okay, people. We are not scary. Haha, okay. Maybe we're just a weeny bit scary in school. But, outside school, we are totally nice and friendly people!

So, we actually went into the Mrt station thing and even tapped our EZ-link cards. But, the train was far too crowded. So, we decided to take a bus. Yup, so we took a bus down to the National Library. I tell you, Rie's eye sight is.. whoah. I shall not elaborate. But, its mad. Seriously. Haha.

We reached the library and then we started to study. Okay, study study study. Nothing much to say about studying. But, I learn better when I talk my revision out. I memorised my Bio stuff when I spoke it out. Cause, I accompanied her to the toilet. Haha. Okay, unecessary information.

Yup, then I took a break from studying and I explored a jungle in the library. Cool right? Haha, Rie has a new hobby. She likes to throw stones at people. Funny right? Haha, and, she likes to spy on me too. Even funnier!

Then, we went to Suntec City for Lunch. And, I ate some udon thingy. Which really looked like worms! Cool yeah? Hahahaha. :D

What an interesting day. Haha, its called the journey of self-discovery. Haha, amazing la. I can't believe it either. Seemed very surreal, right? Haha.

Okay, I shall stop here.

I love you endlessly.

2008-09-01T06:09:00.000-07:00

I feel funny today. I don't know why also.

I had my piano examination today. Okay, lesson learnt. Practice regularly, don't stop. Ohman, I feel so, uhhh. If only I practiced a weeeny bit more and a weeeny bit harder. Haha. Never mind! Failure is the first step to success, right?

Anyways, I'm going to talk about things which are like, totally random. Haha.

I wanted to say this for a really long time. I think God is teaching me patience. Maybe its cause everything is just moving so fast, so quickly that I'm just blindly following behind it. But, I somehow feel that God is trying to tell me slow down.

As most of you know, I have a superrrrr laggy phone. As in, it is real slow in its reaction time. Okay, this is going to sound quite stupid. But, I appreciate its laggy-ness sometimes. You know sometimes when I want to delete my messages, then it'll take me forever just to scroll down and check which messages I want to delete. Yes, I admit it gets really irritating sometimes. But nevertheless, its as though God is trying to tell me to be patient. Like, hey! Whats the rush?

I guess many people, me included, don't have the patience to wait. Haha, I think I sound like some 60 year old preacher. Just, bear with me. Teehee.

It takes a really long time to nurture any sort of relationship. Even friendship. Patience is the key. No point rushing God because he knows whats best for you. Haha, sometimes I feel like I'm thumbing God down with all my wants. Really thank God that he has his three answers- yes, no and wait. When God asks you to wait, he's teaching you patience.

Psalm 32:8- The Lord says, "I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you."

Alright, I shall stop here(:

Cause its all about you.

2008-08-31T06:34:00.000-07:00

He who began a good work in you, will be faithful to complete it.

Ohmy. Its been ages since I last blogged. Haha. Anyways! I keep telling myself I want to blog about this. So, here it is. GUESS WHAT! I got my IC! Yayeness. Haha. I remember when I went to make it with Ong. It was so funny cause we only could collect it a month later. But see?! I collected it already. Hallelujah. Now I feel older. Hehe.

FRIDAY

Anyway, it was teacher's day celebrations last Friday. Gosh, what an embarassing thing to do! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Crazy. Crazy. Haha, Okay, relax Sam. You did fine. Just fine. Rahhh. Haha. Its kind of a long story. You could ask me if you wanna know.

Yes, so, I was supposed to go back to primary school with Xuan Rong. But she had some art thingythingy. So, I waited for her for ages. And in the end, I decided to go back first. So guess what! I didn't manage to visit primary school. Ohmy. Sadness. I had leftover muffins!

Ohyeah! The school staffroom was horribly flooded with people. Usually nobody goes in there. But on Friday. It was as though there was some major big mega concert inside the staff room with major celebrities from Hollywood. Cause all the students were desperately screaming out teachers' names. It was an amusing sight. Haha. So I decided to wait for the crowd to disperse before giving away my gifts. :D

Yeah, after that I met Rie for lunch at WestMall. Then, I saw the Rizki guy (I don't know how to spell). Funny. Haha, then.. we walked and walked a while, we saw Chia Ming Hui Diane! Haha. I don't know why, I like to say people's full names out. Okay, I'm weird. Anyways, yeah, I saw her then she started hitting me cause I called her Dianneey dear. Lame man Diane. Totally. Joking! Hah.

Ohyes, then Rie came to crash my house. She's funny. Supposed to stay until 3, then she stayed until 430 and went straight for BC from my house and I had tution. Okay, she crashed my house to listen to me play piano. Haha.

SATURDAY

I love Saturdays because they mark the start of the weekends. Joy! :D :D :D Yeah, we had Ywav today. But, this time it was quite funny. This week was combined Youth games. And, we played board games. I played Mad Magazine and Risk. I tell you, Risk is a borriiinnggg game. Haha! Maybe cause I don't know how to appreciate it. But, after playing that game, I have come up with one conclusion - I cannot be a war strategist. My country will die after one day. HAHA! Actually, I had a whole continent with my troops in it. But! Shtooopid Yasushi keep attacking me and ate up all my troops. Haha, never mind. I was being gracious. (Yeah right.)

Yeah, Caleb Wong was making ALOT of noise. Mad la that guy. Haha, on the whole it was quite fun I guess. Something different from the normal wet and muddy games that we play. Yaye!

SUNDAY (TODAY)

Sorry, lazy to post pictures. I'll probably do it tmr or something.

I went out for lunch with Karen, Natania, Diane, Joel and SamZ. Haha. It was like, the first 'youth leadership' fellowship session kinda thing. So, we went to eat Jap food and had a time of sharing about how we felt about cell and everything. Quite a fruitful one I guess. Karen asked quesitons which provoked much thought. Cool la.

Ohyeah! I forgot to announce. NATANIA is part of PHOS! How cool is that?! I bet she's overwhelemed by me every week when I see her. I don't know why, I like saying her name. Like, NA- TAN- NIIAAAAAAAA. Quite fun! Go try! Haha. Anyways, Welcome to Phos! I bet she's reading this. Cause today she just told me that she reads my blog. Great job! I've got another stalker. Hah, joking!

Yeah, thanks Karen for treating us today. And SamZ for your bubble tea. Haha. Great youth leaders. :D

I went out with my family and Uncle Peng Seck and family for dinner today. It was mad queue. We waited for about 1 hour. Haha, and waited about half an hour for the food to arrive. Haha, funny! I told Janice the Gorilla story! Cool right?! (I bet you don't know whats the gorilla story about! Ask me! Ask me!) Haha. Yup, I realised one thing. My brother CANNOT smile properly! Haha.

Alright, thats all I guess, getting lazier and lazier. Anyways I think you all got a headache after reading this. PIANO EXAM TMR. AHHHH. Okay! I shall stop here. Bye!

Theres no greater love than this.

2008-08-26T06:56:00.000-07:00

You are stronger, you are stronger.

Hello. :D Haha, today is one of the rare days that I ever get time to blog. But, ohwell. I'll just write whatever I feel like writing. Hehe.

Its, Tuesday! And, today is the 26 August. You know what that means? I'm 15 years and 2 months old today. Hallelujah. Gosh, time really flies. Like, 2 months ago I was 15. And now, I'm 15 years and 2 months! Haha. Right, I think that was unecessary information.

Hmm, guess what! Piano exam got postponed. Cause, I couldn't rush in time for the exam. So, they will rescheldue me. But, I'm not really sure when it is yet. Thanks to everyone who kept me in prayer! (:

I so CANNOT WAIT for September holidays to come. Not that its going to be a real holiday for me. But, I just got a feeling that I'll feel happy. :D:D

Yup, today I went for lunch with Rie, and I shared like stuff with her. I guess she's right la. The more negative things I think about, the higher chances of them happening. But, its something that is really really important to me. And I won't risk it for anything else. Yup. Gosh, what happened to my self-confidence. Haha, but guess what! Today I learnt about treasuring whatever I have around me. And that itself is something to be thankful about. Its, a blessing by itself. So yes, thank God for everything. Its as though he mapped out every single thing that would happen. He knew what was going through my mind, and surefly he worked his way through to give me the best and honour my desires.

Its going to be 3 months soon. Really thank God for everything. Its like, pooof. And this blessing just 'dropped' out from the sky. Ohwell. (: You know, sometimes I feel inhibited when I blog. Cause, I can't be totally honest here. So, many things you read are all in surface view and meaning. Teehee.

Alright, school work wise, I guess I've been doing fine. But, I failed A maths again. When I promised to get a B3. Hey, I will get it okay. I will. Its just a matter of time. And, I will do it, cause it concerns my life! Haha. Ahem. Someone owes me 10 points! HAHA.

You know what! I just realised that even if I don't have confidence in myself, I need to trust you. Not that I don't. But, yes! Okay! No more worrying! Besides, I also need to trust God's plan for me.

Yes! Its 1011. And I am going to sleep NOW. Cause, I don't often get the chance to sleep so early. So, must make full use!

BYE!

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

2008-08-21T07:31:00.000-07:00

You'll be in my heart, no matter what they say.

Hello people! HAHA, sorry I haven't been blogging regularly. Its like, everytime I want to blog, I feel tired then I'll just go and sleep. Ohwell, these few days have been, chaotic and tiring.

Loads of stuff to be finished up like, Bio Authentic stuff. Thank God its over already. It was like, mad rush every night. Haha. We had A maths test on Tuesday. So, mommy asked me how the test was. And I told her that I thought it was rather bad. And then I got scolded from school all the way back home. Aiyah, I shall not talk about it. But, it was rather disturbing I guess.

Yup, then we had birthday party celebrations for Xue Lao Shi. And the Ex-students like, ThernYang, Marc and Julian came back. How cool right?! Yup, so I baked her a cake together with YuXin who brought BeeHoon and other stuff. Ohman, it was cool.

Yup, I can't remember everything else that happened in the week cause everything has just been like, zooming past. And now, I look forward to the weekends! Ohman, I miss the weekends! But, its coming. Its coming.

So, today we had CCA farewell! Yup, haha. Quite a success. Thanks to Annabella Teo! YAYE. And Evageline Pousson and everyone else la. Yup. Okay, today was kind of the most retarded day in school. Haha. After CCA, Rie and I waited for my parents. So, we met Vivienne. And these are the retarded pictures that we took.

AND, they took videos of me screaming la. Tsk. It was total unglam please. Haha! Okay, pictures! OKay, we were wearing jackets so that the school logo cannot be seen!

Haha, Vivienne is teaching me how to split. HAH.

First, you open your legs.

Second, you open them wider.
Third, you open them even wider.

Fourth, you leave the photo and let Vivienne split by herself. HAHA. We are mad people.

Right, I shall go now. Bye!

Just to hear your still small voice again.

2008-08-18T07:02:00.000-07:00

When you believe.

Ohman, I'm really tired. I can feel my eyes like, closing gradually. But the Bio Authentic thing is driving me nuts I tell you. Totally, its 10:48. And I hear my bed calling my nammeeee. But, I still have to finish up this proposal thing.

Blah, okay. I wanna sleep. :(

It will be forever,